my Space

veryskinnycat

2012-02-08T22:16:00.000-08:00

veryskinnycat gobbling down two portions of food

the very skinny cat that i used to chase away when feeding blackcat, skinnycat and fatcat. in this photo, i already took of her polka-dotted pink collar that she was wearing. i've always had the impressions that she was an owned cat, because of her collar and chased her away when she tried stealing skinnycat's food.

last evening, i think she was too desperate, she came up to me and purred, and kept tugging at her collar, as if to tell me that she's not owned, and she's very very hungry. i touched her and realised that she was all skin and bones. wrinkled up skin were just remnants of her former healthier self. she became so skinny that her skin was saggy because of it. the poor cat. and to think that i've misunderstood her for so long! i feel so bad :(

the pink polka dotted collar was so worn and tattered, which i didn't notice cos i didn't even let her near me enough to see. :(

the poor thing!! i'll feed her as often as i can now. she's such a poor thing.

Baking: chaos in a cup

2011-12-21T09:34:00.001-08:00

Hello me. Ive been so busy lately, with iloveitsew and all, that my mind is so preoccupied. I thought I was equipped, gamed to conquer the treacherous world (wide web). But alas, my sword has fallen short and my armour has failed me. The triumphant victory or victorious triumph that I envisioned, eluded me. So what does one do when one feels like all, but not ALL is lost? Bake. Well, at least for me. To me, baking is an art of containing chaos in a cup. Delicious sweet chocolatey rich chaos in a cup. And yet, it is with this chaos that I feel like I am most in control. Maybe it's the step by step recipes to follow. Maybe it's the knowing that no matter what, things will turn out alright (maybe with a little fixing, but still alright).Let me explain, first. The preparation. Bringing out the ingredients one by one, knowing full well that you have prepared everything. It's not often that people experience this level of assuredness in life. Flour, sugar, eggs, butter, milk, cocoa, salt, vanilla essence, baking powder, baking soda. There you have it, the ingredients to make the chaos. Measuring it out is a whole other joy. Yes I do have a recipe to follow. But like jack sparrow's old friend barbossa said, these things are merely guidelines. In goes a little more chocolate, in goes a little more this and that and wala, a perfect recipe, tweaked to a perfection only I would understand. Now comes the creaming. "cream the butter and the sugar until light and fluffy." I've always found it amazing how two things can come together and create light-ness and fluffy-ness. Only butter and sugar can. Creamy oily sugary goodness with two of the simplest ingredients. Don't judge a book by its cover. Being light and fluffy doesn't make it easy to attain. In fact, one of the most important steps in baking is creaming the butter and sugar, to ensure that just the right amount of air is in the batter to help get things going.Next, sifting the flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Another favourite part of mine to see the white flour and dark cocoa mix to form marbles of powder blending and cracking with each scoop. Then we crack the eggs into the creamed mixture, adding the vanilla as well for the extra oomph. letting it go all gooey knowing full well the next step would create wonders. Alternating the flour mixture and milk is a tricky one. I suggest, start with the flour first, alternating with the milk, and always finish the flour mixture first. Because you can always get more milk, but you can't get more right proportion of flour and cocoa powder and etcetc. When in life do you get this kind of knowledge that you can so easily apply? Well, maybe there is somewhere else, but baking is one of the easiest way aint it? Finally, an avenue for me to apply knowledge! No one can say you are wrong because it is my trick and my cupcake.it gives me a sense of peace folding in the light brown flour mixture, into the creamed mixture to get a rich dark chocolate brown that looks so tempting. Of course, don't eat the batter because the egg is still raw.Scooping the batter into the cupcake cups, is another art. With two spoons as tools, one spoon to scoop, one spoon to clean the other out. I feel very satisfied to have a clean tray with no drips. That is my ultimate goal.Putting it in the oven is the only part I dread. Because I have no control over that whatsoever. I have grilled cupcakes before because of the wrong oven settings. But no matter. As much as professional bakers warn never to re-cook your baked goods, I still do that if I'm not satisfied. Comes out just fine. And if Im still not happy, I can carve and sculpt the cupcake the way I want it to look. Then comes the icing. The icing on the cake. No wonder they use it as a phrase. The icing on the cake truly is the icing on the cake! It covers up all flaws, and at the same time, enhances the flavour of the cake. Along with beautifully coloured fondant, the final product looks almost too good to be true. But that's not all, there's still the cleaning up. Washing and soaping all the oily chocolatey goo off, is therapeutic actually, makes you have a sense of achievement after everything. Washing up also comprises of showering after s long night of smelling like butter.And now, settling down to go to sleep, it is this feeling I get, the fact that God gave me the ability to create something of out nothing. It keeps me going. It is actually the first time I've gained such enlightenment about baking. I've never thought of it this way before, only thought it was something I enjoyed doing. But yes it makes me happy and yes I feel accomplished. I'll never look at baking the same way again.You've guessed it, I love my chaos in a cup.

My first post using ipad2 (:

2011-11-18T22:45:00.001-08:00

This is my first post using my ipad2! Ramen wouldn't allow me to take a photo of us to post. -.-"

spendthrift: a word i will never get and will never be

2011-10-31T08:26:00.000-07:00

i have never understood the word "spendthrift". spend is the opposite of thrift. so how can a spendthrift mean someone who spends money extravagantly. how can it even be a word? its like... deadlive. it means someone who is very very dead. or goodbad means something very very good.

so i've been thinking, many people have been saying that i'm a spendthrift. i admit, i do spend sometimes. though i know i'm not the worse of the lot, but to prevent myself from being a defensive mess, yes i do spend. i spend on clothes, bags, shoes, and all other stuff that i like. nice food. etc etc. you get the drift. BUT did it ever occur to you that (you being people who think i'm spendthrift) even though i part with my money easily on my whims and fancies, i also give far more willingly (and easily of course) to others' necessities. i would like to think that i'm a generous person. and i give willingly to any good cause, sometimes literally without batting an eyelid.

you may be someone who saves a lot of money. but on the flip side. are you a STOOGE? are you selfish? is money ALL you think about? is it your STRONGHOLD? you might say you are saving up for something important, then that's great. but what makes a whole lot difference is does that give you a right to judge others on their spending habits?

let me explain a concept. God gave me life, gave me everything. so He can judge my everything. My parents gave me a roof over my heads, made me who I am today, provided for me, so they can judge who I am. but what did you give to me to make you think that you have the right to judge my character when you don't even know the half of the story? trust me, you don't. you don't provide for me, nor give me money, so don't go around on your high horse, judging me on my spending habits. I NEVER placed you on a pedestal.

money is just something i use. its a currency, a tool of trade. i wouldn't collect it. wouldn't keep it. its just a means to survive. give me $100,000 for my grandfather's old broken seiko watch that he left me. i would say no. heck, give me a million dollars for it, i would still say no.

and now is probably the time you start thinking, well this girl must be born with a silver (or maybe golden) spoon in her mouth. well, contrary to popular belief. i'm not. i lived in a simple 2 room flat with my parents. until my dad worked hard and earned enough to get a condo. and 2 cars. and yes, at the point in time, i was at the upper middle end of a normal working family. but then came the recession, and as young as i was and as little savings as i had, it was all contributed to paying the bills. it was down to nothing again. we were in debt and i learnt a lesson of life.

the lesson i learnt, was not that we should scrimp and save and earn as much as we can for the FUTURE. because what life or future is there if we dont enjoy the life we're living and bless others? the lesson i learnt is that money is not as important as it is esteemed to be. let that mentality go. because if we were to live with that mentality, my family would have never gotten the help we needed to tide through those hard times. though many turned away, there were still relatives & family friends who blessed us without asking for anything in return.

i could go on and on about my thoughts on this. like i admitted earlier. yes i like nice things, and i have expensive taste on ice cream and what not. but money is just not something i hold dear to my heart. i don't mind letting it go.

there's a parallel to everything. there's the stooge and someone who is just conscientious. a stooge judges others. frowns upon the perils of "luxury". being conscientious is taking care of yourself and your family. then, there's the materialistic and someone who has more important things in life than money. I am trying to strike a balance to being more of the latter of both. but never ever will i accept the label of being a "spendthrift"

so there you have it. my thoughts during a shower.

the help

2011-10-24T00:45:00.000-07:00

watched the help yesterday. its beautiful. well-paced, touching, just enough jolts and pokes, but not so much so you feel tired after watching. the bad people dont get cheesy defeats, the good people dont get victory without sacrifice. its realistic and yet, light even with the very heavy content it is portraying. ITS A MUST WATCH. MUST!!!!

the shack & the dentist

2011-09-26T18:45:00.000-07:00

After reading it over and over again, i finally came to an understanding as to what the quote i asked you guys about meant. just read some reviews on it and actually, its quite a controversial book. but i'm figuring it out as i go on.

So the context is:

God the Father takes the form of an African American woman who calls herself Elouisa and Papa, Jesus Christ is a Middle-Eastern carpenter, and the Holy Spirit physically manifests itself as an Asian woman named Sarayu.

in the first part of Mack's conversation with Papa, he was growing more and more confused as he wanted to believe what He was saying, but just found it too difficult considering the situations he's been through. he doesn't have a father figure to look up to because his dad was an abuser and alcoholic. and his youngest daughter, Missy was brutally murdered by a serial killer. body never found, killer never caught.

so the quote is:

"most birds were created to fly. being grounded for them is a limitation within their ability to fly, not the other way around.... you on the other hand, were created to be loved. so for you to live as if you were unloved is a limitation, not the other way around."

as i thought about it, i realised that the "not the other way around" is a way of saying that when a bird is not flying, it's not the creation of birds to fly that is the limitation, it is the fact that they are grounded that is the limitation.

similarly, when we are living our lives without purpose feeling we are not loved, it is not that we were created to be loved by God that is the limitation, it is the fact that we are living as though we aren't loved by God that is the limitation.

we are not limited by the love of God because it is limitless.

ok. so i went to see the dentist yesterday. or rather, oral surgeon. at oralmaxillofacial. the dentist was quite funny and nice actually, though i think they could use one better receptionist rather than 3 gabra-ing ones, all of whom doesn't seem like they know what they're doing.

anyways, the doctor noticed on the 2-d xray that my bottom 2 wisdom teeth was very very near to the nerve and wanted to be sure what he was dealing with, so he decided to take a 3-d xray. in my heart i was praying that maybe i dont need to take out my wisdom teeth! but...alas...

after taking the 3d xray, he saw that.... i have a very unique set of teeth. not only that my 2 bottom wisdom teeth are growing completely horizontally, the right bottom one has 3 ROOTS instead of 2 roots, and the left bottom one has a hooked root, which is touching the nerve. so he might have to leave the hooked root behind even though he's extracting the tooth. he looked and me and was like...your teeth is weirr...special! very rare and special. and i was thinking...so can dont take out? he was like...must take out. CHAM LA.

so anyways, he says my teeth are very big, as concurred by apparently all dentists that i've been to. and he recommends that i do braces! which my dad will be very happy to know. my dad thinks my teeth is hideous. i kinda think its cute, and its me. would sarah without ba-geh be sarah? THAT is the quesion. so he said i should consult a orthodontist first, to see if there is a need to pluck out teeth in order to put the braces in, and if there is, he could extract them altogether along with the 4 wisdom teeth. sooo....hmm... hafta see how.

gotta see which week i can take 1-week MC!!!

i'm scared :( the only good thing i guess is i cannot eat what i want, and so in doing (or not doing), i can lose some weight. coupled with braces and uncomfort if i intend to do them, should be able to lose even more weight. so.... AH. i must pray about it.

cats and dogs.

2011-09-21T07:40:00.000-07:00

am watching dog whisperer now. and loving it. its soooo smart all the things he does. and it really works. i just remembered my old dog. isaac. he was soooo cute! just remembered his funny antics. a barker, not a fighter. he hated my aunt florence. only her. anyone else, he's fine. and my mom just reminded us why. when isaac was younger, he was v protective of my sis and i. one time, aunt florence pretended to hit me and strangle my sis in front of him. and he totally wanted to pounce and attack aunt florence. from then on. he sees her as danger. and wants to pounce on her every single time he sees her. there was once, his leash got loose. and he ran towards her. aunt florence climbed on the sofa and started stamping her feet profusely. and she got a sprained ankle from that. isaac didn't really hafta to do anything. haha. that silly dog.

went down to look for the cats again today. blackcat was sleeping on top on the first car that's at the carpark near the walkway. her usualy spot. she's the quietest most dignified cat ive ever seen. maybe bcos she's a mute, she can't convey her emotions via voice, so she uses her body language. very very graceful. she refused to eat any of the treats or food i gave her today. must be too full. i moved on to skinnycat, skinnycat totally gobbled down everything. still very scaredy, didn't dare let me touch her, but she let me move nearer to her this time. finally saw preggerscat. gave her 2 treats today. she ate it real daintily. but was really distracted by this lizard nearby. super cute. but, they didnt eat the salmon pockets i bought for them :( its a healthy treat that promotes good oral hygiene, healthy teeth and eliminated bad breath.

LOL. i'm becoming the weird woman who feeds cat. oh well, i hope at least if i'm in trouble, they'll come to my rescue. (:

blackcat and johnny

2011-09-19T06:50:00.000-07:00

blackcat was waiting for me at the lift lobby today. she refused to let me go home, kept following me around until i had to play catch with her! and yes, she caught me. when i finally got away from her, reached home and settled down, there she was emerging from the stairwell! slowly sauntering towards my gate. how did she know where i lived?!?! so intelligent and soooo beautiful!

watched johnny english over the weekend. was sooooo funny! so many lol moments. hahaha. i can remember laughing out loud when he first started speaking mandarin. and oh my goodness. just his actions. are so stupid and hilarious at the same time. you are like in a conflict. your mind tells you its stupid, but your funnybone tells you its HILARIOUS. just go watch it if you wanna destress and have a good laugh. hahaha.

2011-09-11T23:45:00.000-07:00

watched contagion on fri night. wasn't as impactful as i thought it might be. considering the heavy weight cast, i felt like the only people who matched their heavy weight status was matt damon and kate winslet. the rest of them were pretty forgettable. not through any fault of gwenyth paltrow though. cos she died like...minutes into the show. Jude law was kind of out-of-point. all i remember about him is his horrid teeth. so black and dirty. i wonder if its on purpose.
the mass hysteria scenes were played out quite well, but it wasn't real enough to believe. it was pretty isolated. the death scenes were unfeeling. people died like flies in this movie (according to the movie its 26 million), i expected more 'feelings' of any kind. but not really. kate winslet died, just died. i guess if the director was going for numbness of emotions towards death, he probably achieved it with the storyline.

watched country strong last night as well at lulu's. its nice! leighton meester is so beautiful. and so it gwenyth paltrow of course. but leighton meester. she's really beyond gossip girl. totally beyond. i didn't like the ending though. i mean if its country STRONG. why did she choose to commit suicide in the end? its really contradictory to her powerful victorious rendition of the song in her final concert. oh well. but its still nice nonetheless.

2011-08-22T00:35:00.000-07:00

I MUST EXERCISE AT LEAST 45 MINS A DAY.

2011-08-21T19:52:00.000-07:00

there's something that i told myself i must blog about. and that is about the prata place at nex. there's this prata place called prata wala (according to ramen). we ate brunch there on national day. the prata is actually not bad. but the curry however, disappointing. one thing is that they ran out of fish curry, ramen's must-have curry for roti prata. and it was in the late morning mind you. how do you expect to carry on doing business with so little curry? the mutton curry was more sweet than anything else. the chicken curry tasted like honey and the dhal curry tasted, well, like sweet dhal. all the curry there is too sweet! so advise bout going there? dont, unless you're bringing your own curry. casuarina is still the best.

mom cooked curry on 21st august, yest. haha. patriotic aren't we? invited ramen over to eat as well. (: official sit down dinner with the parents. but still i didn't introduce him as "hi! this is my boyfriend". i guess somethings doesn't need to be spelled out.

bernice's 21st party was a blast! i had a good time, and i hope everyone else did. i thought the whole thing was well planned-out and well-paced. the ambience at hotel re! was nice too, though i think the food and staff attitude could be better. not smelling like cigarette smoke could be a good start for the staff. tsk. with that said, i can't wait for the photos to be posted!

house-warming at yannick's party was... let's say, full of drinking. it really was a guy's party, looking at the amount of drinks and the things they did. think about what a guy's mind works around, and the party is full of that. anyone else who's not a guy, or unique enough to not think like a guy if you're a guy simply has nothing to do. lol. oh well. but i still enjoyed myself for some weird reason. some of them r really funny when they're tipsy...

2011-07-31T18:54:00.000-07:00

just when i was feeling spiteful.

Luke 6:27-36

But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do no withold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because He is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

thank god for daily devotions.

2011-07-31T09:10:00.000-07:00

just finished showering, feeling so refreshed, only to be greeted by a wave of smoke. because i live on the 2nd floor and there are "burning" bins all around the block. sigh.

anyways, bought a hula hoop last week to try out as an exercise regiment and so far i've been doing ok. if there's one exercise tt's fun, its the hula hoop! and you can do it while watching tv, as with all other exercises i've chosen, but its the fact tt its actually a "game" you're playing, keeping the hoop up, tt's fun. hopefully i'll see some results soon! i'm pretty proud of myself for keeping up with the regiment actually (:

watched captain america today. not a bad show. pretty predictable, feel good show. but its not too bad. this time around, the bad guys were really really in real life bad guys. so, i shall discount the fact that america prevailed as the all time great hero. its not a must watch, but its prolly worth watching sometime. the last part was pretty bittersweet.

am into disney cartoons now. when i have nothing to do, i'll just youtube my fave ones. find the complete list of disney movies from way back when at thecompletistgeek.com. anyways, though Aladdin is my favourite disney cartoon, i've watched it sooo many times. till the LD broke. yes the LD. never heard tt word for so long. i thought it used to mean Large Disc. lol. cos it was so big. i'll prolly watch it again, after i finish the little mermaid (:

2011-07-24T09:39:00.000-07:00

watched bridesmaids today. ramen said he didnt think it was nice. but i thought it was a meaningful movie (except for the last totally unnecessary scene). it reminded me of certain people and things in my own life. it was a chick flick all in all. the newspaper said it is to girls what hangover is to guys. but i dont think so. hangover is really... shallow. there really isn't any meaning to it. whereas bridesmaids actually goes deeper. i kinda like the show. (:

alright. what other stuffs. oh. i bought a exercise hula hoop. lol. and it REALLY hurts. imma have a line of blue-black around my waist. it's weighted and has massage balls around the inner rim, to massage and loosen the fats i guess. lol. hopefully it works!

we are on a budget! by we, i mean ramen and i. we realised, ok ramen realised that if we continue spending on food the way we do, we'd be really broke. so for now, at least for maybe 2 more months, we will not eat at restaurants. only budget places like food courts etc. so far its been working out ok for us. (: we get to eat more at a lower price. on the down side, sometimes its really hot at these places. like we went to killiney for curry chicken today and ramen downed 2 iced soya milk just because it was so hot. and he sweat bucketloads. i didn't have a single drop of sweat while eating, but when we were walking over to the cathay, i did a lil and ramen thought it was disgusting. the boy has weird thinking right. its not disgusting to sweat a bucket load while eating (who knows if some extra ingredients went into the food...) but its disgusting to sweat because you're walking and actually moving about. i laugh at the things he says sometimes. the silly boy.

its really amazing how things turn out sometimes. ok i didn't know if it was such a good idea saying this here, but i'mma just give an idea. i was thking about some stuff after watching the movie. and imagining all my friends getting married. oh and on a side note. I WILL CRY AT MY FRIEND'S WEDDINGS. i'm a crier. always was and always will be. and when i checked my phone when i got back, i got a lovely surprise. its like God really knows my thoughts and He really wants me to know that He can do things in an uncanny way. thank you God, i needed that. (:

2011-07-22T10:02:00.001-07:00

found this photo of johnny depp online. isn't it BEAUTIFUL?!

2011-07-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

you see, the thing about my family is, sometimes i can't even begin to comprehend how ridiculously inconsiderate they are.

1. so everyone's sitting in the lounge watching tv. i'm ALWAYS the last to leave because i still have to pack up the laptop. and they ALWAYS expect me to switch off the two fans WHICH AREN'T EVEN BLOWING AT ME BECAUSE THERE ARE APPARENTLY ONLY A FEW PEOPLE IN THE FAMILY WHO ARE ALLOWED TO BE HOT. and the lights BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE HAS NIGHT VISION. and the tv BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE WAS REALLY STARING AT THE WALL BEHIND IT. i am only a few steps behind them mind you, not even a few minutes. but everyone just decides to leave everything to me ONCE AGAIN.

2. my dad actually tried to scold me for it by saying:" aren't you the last one to leave the living room?!" im like seriously. WHAT THE !@#$!$%#$%@#$% ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! SO NOW I'M THE LAZY ONE. WHEN I JUST CAME BACK FROM WORK A FEW HOURS AGO?!

3. i make it known that i will be bathing after the show ends. and guess who goes into the toilet straight away after the show ends and hogs it.

YOU KNOW WHAT. I GIVE UP.

GOD, PLEASE TEACH US HOW TO BE MORE CONSIDERATE PEOPLE. FAST.

2011-07-14T10:12:00.000-07:00

pretty interestingly impulsive things happen when i'm waiting for my hair to dry. or maybe because it had a precursor.

just sent my friend off to europe. he's gonna be there for 6 mths, experiencing what life is in the bigger world out there. maybe its the grass-is-always-greener-on=the-other-side syndrome. or maybe i was freakishly influenced by the cheesy but alright movie Monte Carlo. maybe its something deeper. these are the people that make things happen, you know. i've always wanted to go on exchange, but it just doesn't happen. dont talk about not having a good enough grade, i guess i just was too lazy to go through with it. i was thinking, enviously actually, how nice it would be if i could be like him. travel the world, see what's really out there. and in the process, change, be wiser, stronger.

so i came home, showered and was waiting for my hair to dry. wanted to mope around during this time, maybe just fall asleep. but i just couldn't. nobody's fault. no particular feeling. i just needed to do something. something like dye my infamous salmon-pink dress. dye it arabian blue (because that's the dye i bought). i intended to do this over the weekend, or maybe next weekend or next next weekend. and maybe that's exactly the problem with me. so NO. its something i have to do now, and now it shall be done.

i finished about an hour later. now. 1:18am. and yes, i feel a great sense of achievement. and even before i fall asleep, i told myself. i must blog about this. because this blog is like an electronic diary, in more ways than one, since diaries are personal, and i figured i am THE only one reading this blog. LOL. so here i am. blogging about it now. feeling kinda sleepy.

so yes. i dyed my salmon-pink dress with an arabian blue dye at 12:18am and it turned out to be a violet colour. its small and insignificant. but at least its a time of change. baby steps. good night world.

2011-07-04T05:43:00.000-07:00

watched Transformers: Dark of the moon 3d on sunday night with lulu.

we tried the Shaw Premiere thingy at nex. i was kinda skeptical at first, considering the high price and the fact that the movie was 3d. my experience with 3d movies are mostly unfortunate, unfortunately. its either the glasses are too dirty and oily. eew. have batteries that are barely functioning, distorted to a funny size and have what they call a "sensor" which doesn't really sense anything and the worst part, the colour of the movie would be severely compromised!

so we went into the lounge only ard 830+, movie starts at 9. lulu wanted to go into the theatre straight which was a good choice. cos the theatre seats are shiok! with warm comfy blankets provided! the seats are leather, like those osim massage chairs without the massage. but there's a button you can press to recline or incline your seat. sounds a lil like farting because of the leather seats, but its still great nonetheless. they provide menus with little lights attached to them so that if you get really hungry during the movie and for some reason, wanna interrupt your movie and order something, you can. there's a call button that you can press and the theatre staff will appear. the 3d glasses were wiped before they were handed to you and it requires no batteries. its light, not chunky like some other cinemas and best of all, colours were not compromised at all! ample leg space, so no kicking of chairs from behind! + we get to have hot mochacinno which tasted good. lulu complained that it became cool too fast.

alright. enough of pros, what about cons? i have only 1 complain. the theatre staff came right in the middle of the action scene nearing the end of the movie to ask lulu to settle the bill. they should've planned the timing better since they should already know the duration or plot of the movie.

ok now for the movie. transformers as usual was LOUD. i was covering my ears throughout the entire movie. i reckoned the new girl wouldn't be as great as megan fox, but i was wrong. or maybe it took rosie huntington whiteley to realise that "the girl" in transformers aren't meant to be "great", they are just meant to be "the girl". as long as they look nice & hot its fine. but at least this girl apparently has more brains than megan fox in the movie. BUT, he's shorter than her, which wasn't really apparent until the last scene where they hugged. they made it look like he lifted her up, but, lol, it was quite obvious her feet wasn't off the ground. she isn't the conventionally pretty girl, but she's still beautiful. i thought it was quite funny that optimus prime was gone most of the fight scene because he got tangled in some wires from a nearby construction sight after getting hit by shockwave. and i totally lol-ed at the part where bumblebee threw sam out of himself and put him back in but he continued screaming like mad. LOL. but yeah, like almost everyone else says, the storyline was bad, but the action was nonetheless nt bad. and why did they hafta kill ironhide. like so sudden. :(

___________________________________________________________________

lulu had dinner with my family last sunday, and as usual, my mom was extra sweet and gentle to him because he's a boy. but it was nice and all. my dad was his usual extra stern self whenever my friends are around. quite funny actually because my mom was making fun of him and he obviously wanted to laugh along, but no, he had to suppress it because lulu was around. lol. this thursday will be commencement! will be going for both lulu's and lifescience's sessions!

2011-06-13T09:50:00.000-07:00

wow. this blog has been long forgotten. and just sitting here waiting for my hair to dry has jolted my memory of its existence.

ok! i shall blog more often. for no one else but myself. actually.

just posted pictures of boracay! which was my grad trip no. 2. no. 1 was usa. of which there are thousands of photos and i simply have no time nor energy to upload them just yet. + the nice photos are all with lulu.

anyways, some highlights of Boracay 21st May - 24th May 2011

lulu and i in front of the first propeller plane both of us ever took in our lives. + the airport seemed like something from LOST. pretty cool.

the gang on the boat from Caticlan to Boracay.

we stayed in a mansion on a hill, called Diniwid Hills, or according to Ger, Windy Hills.

the view from the pool. don't you just wish you were there?

moooooocho, the permanent resident of the mansion. along with the 2 housekeepers and driver.

the sunset view from the sunset room. note that all the rooms doesn't have curtains so we can soak up the views entirely.

white beach. kinda obvious why it's named that. clear waters, fine sand. really, one of the most beautiful beaches ive ever seen. considering the number of people there, its surprising to see how pristine this place is.

the famous (or should i say infamous) ariel's point. for cliff diving amateurs and enthusiasts alike, everyone follows a rule. leap with faith, at your own risk.

taken from the 16m cliff. with one hand tightly clasping the rail for dear life. for all the macho talk i did before coming to this place, about how i can do it, how i'm a thrill seeker. it kinda shut me up (humbled me) after seeing the height. and chicken-ing out from jumping the 5m cliff the first few tries didn't really help my incessant bragging earlier either. lesson learnt? don't brag about what you have yet to do. not because of what others might think of you later, but because of the disappointment and realisation of what you thought you could do, but didnt.

proof that the alcohol made them do it. 16m cliff diving, they went.

group shot after ariel's point. bruised and battered. not that it mattered.

sunset at white beach

guess what i was trying to take a photograph of? spot the red eye. i <3 lizards.

view from the boat.

final group shot. my oh my have i put on weight. as the host on the biggest loser would say, time to cut the fat. and i am trying!

~end of Boracay~

more updating soon!

2011-03-31T06:17:00.000-07:00

amidst a spoilt shoe, a poor dead bird, a pointless argument, and the dreaded feeling that i wont get to have a good night's sleep tonight, im feeling frustrated and sad.

sheldon:"... one cries because one is sad..." i shall follow his advise.

2011-03-17T06:01:00.000-07:00

YAY! FOUND THE blair waldorf dress that i've always wanted to sew. somehting like that la. but not exactly.

2011-03-15T17:35:00.000-07:00

been receiving messages about the nuclear rain hoax. and i'm just really annoyed at the ignorance of it all. its already been said that its a hoax! why would people still spread this around. its just making people worry for nothing, if they're as ignorant to believe it. most importantly, isn't it really selfish and disrespectful to the people who are actually suffering the real consequences of what has happened in japan?

churning nonsense from such a tragedy, how could it not be disrespectful? people are dying, losing their homes, families, losing everything over there, and over here people are spreading rubbish in an attempt to protect themselves. same goes for all chain mails!

busybusybusy! opened this post at say... 8.35am in the morning? and am finishing only now. and i've not typed all that i wanna type!

2011-03-14T18:12:00.001-07:00

went for first aid course last week so didn't turn up at the office from mon-wed. on thurs when i came back, my inbox was stuffed. :(

anyways. booked USA TICKETS!!! WAHAHAHA. now i hafta conjure up a plan to try to borrow money from my dad.

celebrated ramen's 25th the other day. photos will be up on facebook soon! (:

and i like this song:
Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

2011-03-09T07:56:00.000-08:00

like adam sandler once said:"its hard to soar like an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys."

i dont have space to dream. i dont have space to maintain the many loves i have. as the dust collects on the boxes underneath my bed, so it does on the word "have" so much so its becoming a "had". though i'll never allow that. its frustrating and its making me a green-eyed monster.

i hate it.

i am desperate. please God.

2011-03-02T19:44:00.000-08:00

am excited bout USS this coming saturday. finally. a thrill ride in Singapore. trumping ALL no-kick-escape-theme-park nonsense.

ok anyways. here's my sponsored kid! His name is Saw De Lay Sha and he is from Myanmar (:

and here is the letter he wrote for me (: the handwriting seems really neat for a kid though, so dont know if he really wrote it. of course there's translator who translated the letter into english.
he looks quite mischievous right! so cute (:

2011-02-19T23:02:00.000-08:00

so...been watching every game of soccer that KEVII played in. for the first time in all the years of my hall life that i actually went to watch them play for every match. so ironic. anyways... the guys lost the semis to EWWsoff. those pricks won in terms of goal points, but lost in terms of life points. rude, disrespectful, cowardly and without an ounce of sportsmanship, i know who i'll be rooting for to win the finals this year, even though its not kevii.

anyways. during the game against KR to qualify for the semi's. yong shen sprained his ankle. and during the halftime brief, hazel saw that he was leaning against ramen and decided that it was absolutely cute that they were showing such brotherhood. lol. and so... i took a picture.

so cute right?? (: haha.

2011-02-16T18:34:00.000-08:00

i just realised my last post was dec 6. its been such a long hiatus. longer than any other time of hiatus i've had since i started this blog. though i think, this blog is more for me to read back and remember what my life was in the recent past.

what's been going on in my life is that i'm working now. i feel old. i want to go on a graduation trip that doesn't EVER seem to be happening. gosh. getting me started on the whole grad trip fiasco makes me so disappointed. i mean. i couldn't go on one when i graduated, cos, lets face it, none of my friends really graduated. and now, when i actually have the means to go on a really awesome one, NO ONE WANTS TO GO WITH ME. like srsly. i dont know who to be mad at, i dont know who to be upset at. but i am just MAD & UPSET. first it was USA, made me sooooo excited bout the fact that i'm going to be seeing what i see on tv, only this time, i am there and actually seeing it for real. the thought of shopping thrills me, what thrills me even more is how weak the US dollar is now. rallied the group, but it fell apart. the american dream was dashed.

bypassing the random bits of suggestions, europe came along. ah...the ever reliable fallback. the most popular place if i might add, for a higher end uni student getaway. it was almost set, air ticket prices, quotations, planning the route, researching on whats-absolutely-to-see in europe. BUT ONCE AGAIN ... the thoughts of walking the streets of Paris, lounging on the coasts of the Grecian Islands, having tapas in the eateries of Spain, enjoying the ambience on the gondola in Venice, going crazy on the fashion & shops in Milan (maybe i can't afford them, but i can still go crazy about them) and so many more things to do ... WERE NOTHING MORE than a highly stylised mirage.

so the Mayfair and Park Lane of the game of Grad-Trip Monopoly was gone. Still, i'm hoping that at least somehow, i'd be able to get something along the lines of Picadilly or Strand. but after yet another round, i'd be lucky if i could get Old Kent Road or White Chapel Road. The only 2 people left in the game are ramen and i. WONDERFUL.

what happened to EVERYONE?! srsly! why is a grad trip not appealing to anyone at all? why is US and Europe not appealing to anyone at all?! WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!!!!!!!!

i have to get leave, i have to cfm SOMETHING. i have responsibilities and work to do. but i still have my life to lead. SO PLEASE SOMEONE SOMEWHERE SOMEHOW. please make SOMETHING happen. *whimper*

ok i didn't start of this first-post-after-such-a-long-time intending it to be my complain of why a grad trip is so difficult to organise. i started off wanting to update on what's been going on.

on a happier note. KE soccer guys managed to get through to semi-finals on the top of the pack in the group rounds. it was against sheares and kr, and they won both! against sheares 2-0, against kr 1-0. good for them!

ok. i shall stop these few mins of blogging now. SIGH.

2010-12-06T06:25:00.000-08:00

of ramifications.

only these aren't like ripples after throwing a pebble into a pond. these don't disappear after a few seconds. these last. for as long as you live, or longer. these last. more like the meteorite hitting the ocean in deep impact. devastation.

but without it, there isn't a need for hope. so am i hoping for something that is never going to happen or am i ready to give up on something that could make the rest of my life.

it wouldn't be the same. will never be the same.

2010-11-29T04:59:00.000-08:00

my post 22nd birthday celebration

Had a post 22nd birthday celebration! went to lawry's for a meal with ramen. the food is truly good, but its too indulgent. can only go there once in a very blue moon. NO BUDGET. the first was the spinning bowl salad. which was really LOL. in her funny waitress costume, the waitress named princess explained to us about the spinning bowl salad and proceeded on to pour the salad sauce into the spinning salad bowl with a very very very very very funny pose. i wanted to laugh. but it was too rude. HAHA. i should've taken a photo/video man!

then it was the cream of mushroom soup, which was good. followed by our main course, the california cut and the english cut. the california cut is about 175g, whereas the english cut is about 200g? I can't remember exactly. but lawry's traditional cut is 285g, including a side of creamy spinach. ours only had the yorkshire pudding and mashed potato. which made us very much full.

The yorkshire pudding was meant to absorb the "zhap" of the meat. they actually call it quite a nice name, but i forgot. the "zhap" of the meat was really very nice! couldn't have downed the meat without it.

after tt, we had our complimentary desert because it was my birthday! and our picture was taken for us and printed on the spot.

anyways i think lawry's birthday promotion is really quite good. if it's your birthday month, give it a try!

after dinner we went shopping for my present! (:

if i haven't yet, i wanna post a big thank you to everyone who remembered my birthday! thanks to the sec sch gang for buying me the chanel scent. though i know it was jamie who did the shopping. lol. and baked the cake.

thanks to the churchies for baking me that snail cake! ahahaha. quite a funny looking delicious cake.

THANKS! (:

of kinks and King.

2010-11-22T07:36:00.000-08:00

of kinks and King.

have yet to watch the latest episode of GG! ugh. can't find a good zshare link. what's with 26:06?!

God please help me deal with difficult unlovely people! :( ugh. first time in a long time i felt bad. like literally physically gut-discomforting bad. ANNOYING. give me the wisdom and strength to deal with them the way you would. and thank you for sending people to be on my side.

who made you the king of anything? i know the King of Everything. you're nothing more than just a kink in what God's plans are for me.

of weird characters both real and reel

2010-11-13T06:47:00.000-08:00

of weird characters both real and reel

now what do i mean by that? it means that this week, i've met with some pretty strange occurrences that involve weird characters bout in real life and reel life.

real life: hmm...where am i spending most of my time now? and where am i meeting more new people now? if you know the answer, you probably know the group of people, or even the particular guilty i'm talking about. i seriously didn't know how to react to the sudden "CLOSENESS" that was presented in front of me. part of me was thinking WTH. the other part was thinking maybe this means we're good. most of me was just like... blank. God, i really need your help with this. i don't wanna be involved in any politics or negative nuances within the office. but on the other hand. i really dont know how to react! GOD HELP ME!!

reel life: now... WHAT SORT OF RUBBISH IS "ADELE: RISE OF THE MUMMY"?!?!?!?! firstly bad dubbing from french to english. secondly, their scenarios DONT MAKE SENSE AT ALL. its just random things happening all over the place with this random girl finding random things with random enemies popping out and random bad animated characters being revived from the dead. LIKE WHAT THE. i have never ever wanted to walk out on a movie before and this movie, i really wanted to. WHAT A WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY. its a horrible show whose movie poster isn't even worth searching for to put up on my blog. NONSENSE RUBBISH POOP.

2010-11-09T07:15:00.000-08:00

there's something melancholy about sitting in a bus stop alone while cars hurry past.

helped a blind man to take a bus today. but had to miss 2 of my buses. i will go STRAIGHT home tomorrow so i can reach home earlier. no more detours. i hate to admit it. but it really kinda is just a waste of my time. unfortunately.

There's a harvest each saturday night

At the bars filled with perfume and hitching a ride

A place you can stand for one night and get gone

It's clear this conversation ain't' doing a thing

Cause these boys only listen to me when i sing

And i don't feel like singing tonight

All the same songs

The situation's always the same

You got your wolves in their clothes whispering Hollywood's name

Stealing gold from the silver they see

But it's not me

Here in these deep city lights

Girl could get lost tonight

I'm finding every reason to be gone

Nothing here to hold on to

Could i hold you?

Calling out somebody save me i feel like i'm fading away

Am i gone?

Calling out somebody save me i feel like i'm fading

2010-10-26T06:41:00.000-07:00

went for appointment letter verification and medical checkup in school today. amidst form filling and stuffs, everything only took 1 1/2 hrs! so fast. first time i spent less than 2 hrs in UHC. the most interesting thing of the day was the finger prick for my blood test. i thought she was at most only gonna take a few drops from that tiny prick, but NO. she took a tubeful from that prick. i'm like...what the...! she just kept squeezing and squeezing and squeezing my finger! ok, i know its better than the needle. but still. it hurt.

i just wanna say, thank God for letting everything go so smoothly, i would've never gotten this job without His divine intervention. i will be counting on His guidance and strength when i start because God knows i have allllooottt to learn. He really does. Lol.

MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING SOOON!!!!! (: (: (: HEH HEH HEH!!!!

looking out of my balcony now and i see Louis-Vuitton and Chanel taking a walk at the playground. those are the 2 chihuahuas that live above me. one cream one ebony. SUPER CUTE.

2010-10-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

what i've been up to

in view of the horrid haze, i've developed some kinda cough. and in view of my monthly blessing, i've developed bloatedness, acne, tummyaches and heightened irritability. if you're wondering why i still use the word "blessing", it might be because i wanna be a mother someday, and that desire trumps all the other nonsense. which reminds me of the unfair treatment of women in singapore with regards to pay, that i already blabbered on in some previous post so i will not rant further.

so the hr dept of NUS finally called me. hallelujah! after waiting so long and thinking that they might forget. but prof tan was nice enough to drop me an email to tell me they're still hiring me. lol. i'm going for a medical checkup on tues. and i hope this cough don't mean nothing to them!

been doing some online research for this job, and now that its really starting, i kinda feel a little more scared than excited. after all, i didn't major in pr. will i ever be adequately prepared?

visited NUS museum, quite a nice place. but bring someone into the NX gallery featuring Fillipo Scia Scia's art stuff cos honestly, i was freaked out. scary sia... dont like it one bit. but i guess its a good exhibit since it garnered such a strong reaction from an audience.

i feel like swimming tmr. stupid haze.

2010-10-13T22:09:00.000-07:00

went kboxing with wl and linda yest. and it was fun (: for me at least! linda seemed a lil tired. and wl's just as self high as ever. and she kept singing songs we didn't know came from where. like sunwukong. or like dunno what la. then surprise surprise! she chose the first eng song. "love story" which she didn't really know the tune of. but i had fun singing both eng/chinese songs! though i understood the eng songs better.

we need to do that sometime again. since its only 8 bucks right. can sing for 4 hours. not bad! can walk home after that somemore.

its the first time i saw the mtv of katy perry's thinking of you. and i actually think its more meaningful than any of her other mtvs. or at least those that i've watched. quite sad! i'm sure if becca and i were there together, we'd cry.

night cycling tmr. dont know if i'm up for it!

2010-10-11T09:41:00.000-07:00

was trying to find kayla and kupono's contemporary dance addiction to sara bareilles gravity today but couldn't find it! finally found a good and reasonably clear video here.

http://dancejam.com/videos/1054605418-sytycd-kayla-kupono-addiction-by-mi

haven't been writing here for some time now. maybe i've lost touch.

just been slacking around these whole time. a lil anxious at the fact that prof tan said that the hr department would call for medical and security checks, but they haven't yet. yikes.

finished watching personal taste (: quite a sweet show. she's a little mature for him, i feel, especially after watching her summer scent persona. its a little off to see her like that. but still sweet! oh and chang-ryul. the first time i saw him i thought...looks familiar. and i realised he looks like joel! my cousin joel. i even told my hallmate. and when i went to my ahma house the other day, my aunt was talking bout this show and guess what she said. exactly the same thing i did. that changryul looks like joel! uncanny.

my life revolves around finding things to do and watching shows for now. but you'd (whoever is reading this) be proud to know that i cleared up my clothes! i threw those that needed throwing, gave those that needed giving and packed and folded those that needed keeping. am proud of my little neat corner. of course, mom helped a great deal.

am watching you're beautiful now. till now, no major complaints. except that all the guys look weird with their eyeliner and all. i really don't fancy guys with eyeliner. make up isn't really a guy thing. and the hairstyle. woahhaha. looks like the hairstylist puked all over their heads. but i guess its "fashion forward" in korea.

definition of intention: an agent's intention in performing an action is his or her specific purpose in doing so, the end or goal that is aimed at, or intended to accomplish. whether an action is successful or unsuccessful depends on at least whether the intended result was brought about. intentions are sometimes, all that matters. because if one knows what the intention is, and feels loved or happy, then sometimes the actions doesn't even need to be carried out. right? i guess that's how love songs/poems come about with their fantastical quips and whimsical lines. i'll pluck the stars, i'll bring the moon down, i'll travel to the sun and back. it doesn't matter whether things are feasible or not, or practical, real, or possible. because reality hits hard as it is. this is a really really pragmatic world. what matters is the fact that there should be people you can be unreal with. people you can wish things with. people you can share your silliest thoughts with. but sometimes, even with the person you want most to do these things with, it doesn't really happen the way you want it. i guess when it gets down to it, you'll have to remember the reason why you want to share this part of yourself with that person and draw more from that well. though the well my run dry in future, at least for now, its still sustaining.

my thoughts for the day. and oh one last thing. its the thought that matters.

2010-10-01T21:18:00.000-07:00

You are reading the blog of the new Public Relations and Outreach Officer of the Raffles Museum of Biodiversity Research of the Faculty of Science of the National University of Singapore.

(:

Thank God i FFFIIINNNAAALLLYYY found a job!

a little intimidated but am raring to go! (:

2010-08-23T07:15:00.001-07:00

WHY ISN'T ANYONE REPLYING ME. I SENT OUT SO MANY APPLICATIONS THAT I'M CONFUSED. REPLY REPLY REPLY. I CAN'T STAND NOT DOING ANYTHING AND BUMMING AROUND NO MORE. PLUS. I NEED THE MONEY.

ARGH.

the most interesting thing that happened to me today is that a baby lizard crawled on my leg when i just finished showering. so cute.

what is wrong with me :(

2010-08-23T02:29:00.000-07:00

Afternoon Tea & Dance at St Regis Brasserie Les Saveurs

went with jocelyn who just came back from korea! considering the fact that we both claim we're kinda broke, a $60 high tea isn't exactly budget friendly. but. oh well. jocelyn seemed to think that it was only $30, and i, a high tea noob didn't even know what was going on. so. neh mind! i liked the sandwiches, and the jam...the strawberry jam to be eaten with scones... is the most delicious jam i ever tasted. and that woman. that siao zha bor came to high tea with bleached and whitened teeth, cannot eat soooo many things. but nehmind. i ate for her.

i kinda think the reason why it was more expensive its cos it was a dance day as well. there were dancers there that kept asking jocelyn and i to dance. but we didn't la. it was a scene for old ladies. not us. we were so full after eating the scones, we couldn't possibly savour the deserts that comprises of mainly tarts after. which was quite wasted.

i tried the grand wedding tea, just because the name was quite funny and it sounded like something a madhatter would drink. jocelyn had warm milk. lol. cos its good for teeth. or rather bleached whitened teeth.

all in all. i felt that... it wasn't worth 60 bucks. though there were some highlights. but...yeah. not worth 60 bucks.

2010-08-18T05:04:00.001-07:00

so went swimming yesterday with weiling! my knee totally hurts like crazy. its like my body stopped producing lubricant between the joints. owww...

then we went to have buffet and struggled to make our money's worth even though we had smaller appetites cos we just exercised. lol. we ate until... we literally had to take out the normal menu and calculate the prices and made sure we ate above the buffet price. gosh.

then we went to get weiling a new bikini! the one she chose is nice. and all because she had a fashion guru with her. that would be me. thanks. LOL.

then we whisked off to her Great Eastern insurance recruitment drive talk thingy. with a special guest speaker adam khoo. just let me say. i was closed to the entire thing and remained closed throughout the entire thing. without feeling bad at all.

walking in, you see all these hypocritical yuppy wannabes shaking hands and saying things like :"oh its been so long since ive seen you!" "how are you doing??" "its nice to meet you!" standard insincere dialogues. and this woman in a white suit. starts waving her hand during an orientation talk like she's having some arm muscle spasms. like... seriously??

first we go into this tiny room they call the million dollar ground. because apparently everything in there is worth a million dollars. and they couldn't get a larger room. that. i dont get. and the "orientator" made a group of about 30 odd people stare into a small computer screen. if its a million dollar room, can't they afford a projector? that. i dont get either.

so we went to another room for another talk about how earning money as an insurance agent is soooo easy and we can easily make LOTSA money. aside from noticing the really badly made powerpoint slides and an eerily black head of hair for his age, i wasn't really paying attention.

and then we went on to yet another room for yet another talk. and i was interrupted by smses which i was still thankful for.

we moved on to the buffet. free food! only ate the porridge. and the porridge issss goood. lol.

so we went on to the main event. had a few videos, a talk by the president of ge, and a talk by an agent who did very well. one thing though. if you wanna get an agent to share their experience in their company, please get one who is coherent enough for people to actually understand what they're saying. slurring and jumping around all the points isn't exactly getting people's attention.

then adam khoo came on. and all the ignorant adults started excitedly participating and laughing at all his jokes. one thing though. seen it all, heard it all! i mean. people who've been to sermons, conferences, seminars would have seen these speakers upteen times! his public speaking is basically just plain as what so motivational about him? basically, his motivation is money. so if we could just stare at money, we'd get motivated too. and he wastes sooooo much paper!!!! just writing and flipping and writing and flipping! seriously. GO GREEN!

then we met up with jamie at mac@amkpark for a little chat.

ok so that pretty much sums up my day yest!! (:

2010-08-16T02:28:00.000-07:00

i actually quite like watching australia's next top model. and i think jodhi, the host, is better than tyra banks! because she's very very up to date with what's been happening in the house and never fails to point out bullying and penalise the girls if they do that. the fierce janice-dickenson-like judge on the panel also quite funny. tyra banks always turns a blind eye on these things, even though things can get soooo ridiculously mean.

some people are just not worth the time and effort. i wish i could be living in hall again. but then again, i can't possibly leave my mom alone to handle all the problems herself. i hope she'll be fine when i leave.

its not easy being up against 2 ticking time bombs all the time.

2010-08-13T05:48:00.001-07:00

the word irritating just doesn't seem to do justice in this case. but any other word would render me horrible. so i shall not use any other word, nor think bout it and waste my time over it.

had a great talk with jamie today (: after walking back from a monster lunch with weehon at botak jones. i thought their massive povolone mushroom burger only had mushroom. BUT turns out. it had a massive amount of BEEF PATTY. what a lousy description in the menu. and confusing at that. they should really change their menu. it was more like a bulletin. full or words. people dont need words when eating. they need pictures and item listing!

went to amkhub to walk around. kinda dragged weehon and ervin around. wanted to watch salt. but no timing! hmm... what else. oh walked back with jamie afterwards. and we had a good long talk about... people. lol. our friends. who are...let's say...in the process of growing up. but we have an understanding that us girls, are just a lil ahead.

went for xiaolongbao buffet last night at hv. eat until my intestine also full. i still feel full now. OH GOSH. i really need to do something bout it.

what's so terrible about it that warrants such a reaction. i don't get. will never get.

roar.

2010-08-02T01:00:00.000-07:00

heading to kl from wed to fri! (: yay!

what am i going to be busy with? after i come back from kl this coming friday, i'm going to send in my resume to HSA. wait for a decision or their advise, and then i'll finally come down to making a decision on which uni to go for masters. the prof still isn't replying. so i guess she isn't interested in helping me. sigh. k so this is the short term plan. which may take up to a 2 weeks or so.

had a photoshoot with jamie and friends at PHS yest! (: it was kinda a bundle of fun. it was quite funny and soooo reminiscent going back to school, booking a classroom, taking photos there. and the photos turned out really really great (: new display pictures! i bet if anyone of them decided to get married to a fellow phs, they'll be taking their wedding photos there. heard some guy even had their wedding ceremony in the school hall. i wouldn't. not grand enough. lol.

the school kinda changed alot. with new murals and stuffs. pretty much the entire system changed. old teachers weren't there anymore. by old teachers i mean teachers who taught my generation. saw mrs.soh, who didn't recognize nor remember us anymore. recognized a few familiar faces other than hers. like miss michelle tang and i agreed, it really doesn't feel the same anymore. there's even a new indoor sports hall that popped out of nowhere! hr kept saying that i live nearby but i didn't notice. and i really didn't! lol.

it was fun catching up with old friends and finding out... hmm.. new information about certain buggers that i don't wanna mention. lol. but its all good (:

so jamie's 22nd was a fruitful one (: she deserves it.

i have a theory.

2010-07-31T09:28:00.000-07:00

just came back from lukie baby's 6th birthday party. it was quite fun (: met a new boy there named ignatius. turns out, his parents are my cousin's neighbours and his mom was my geography teacher in sec 2! Miss Michelle Tang. i always remembered her as the teacher who sang "Fever" on stage with Mr Leek as one of her agogo boys.

ignatius was cute (: he was a gentleman for his age, kept asking

me whether i wanted something to eat/drink. allowed me to play with his transformers 3d card game on the webcam. DON'T get me started on that. kids toys nowadays are so technologically advanced. its amazing. the webcam actually scans a barcode on the collectable card and a question/3d image will be projected on screen to search for the next card... GOODNESS. anyways. back to ignatius, he'll hold my hand if he wanted me to go anywhere with him. how cute right. (:

so anyways. this week was my last week at my aunt's place. which is a good thing cos it was getting abit boring. but no more flexible work days and pay. hopefully, when i send my resume in to HSA, they'll give me a gooood consideration, cos i'm gonna be reeeaaaallll honest with them about my plans etc. i really could do alot more if i could earn some serious money (not pocket money here and there) before going over to aussie.

yay going to kl this coming wed. yay yay yay.

i had some thoughts this week, about random things mostly. like why men get at least $200 more whilst holding the same position as women. ttm would know my "rage" about this matter. well. yes they've sacrificed 2 yrs of their lives serving the govt. WE'RE SACRIFICING A FEW DAYS A MONTH FOR DUNNO HOW MANY YEARS (on the average 45+ years) COPING WITH SOMETHING CALLED MENSTRUATION. we've had to endure cramps, headaches, weakness, and just that plain uncomfort and nagging feeling that there might be a stain. WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO ENDURE CHILD BIRTH. THE SINGLE MOST PAINFUL EXPERIENCE ON EARTH. although...its probably the most joyous experience that any woman could ask for. BUT STILL. PAIN. and. our expenses are higher, considering the fact that we have to buy bras, an extra underwear. and menstruation pads. sorry for

my explicitness. since i know that no one really reads my blog. LOL. i know guys out there will ARGUE to their death about this, cos i kinda alr did with one. but never mind. i shall not remain angry. i shall just be happy that women, US WOMEN, can have the experience of birthing the child that we nurtured and nourished within our bodies because God made us that way. a mother's love can never be replaced. its simply maternal.

watched streetdance the other day. aside from the weird and very strong british accent, the dancing was great. there was less focus on fake drama as i call it. like the ones they mentioned on life!, teenage angst etc. but this isn't a disney movie either, thus the really really really really feel-like-punching-his-teeth-out guy, Jay. or is that his name? anyways if you watch it, you'll know who i'm talking about. REALLY leh. like what is his problem. break up then break up la. why still must cheat her feelings like that. dancing was good. the ballet dancers were really funny. and i'm glad they didn't make the lead girls fall into the cliche of fighting for the lead guys, cos i was kinda expecting that.

talking about dance. musa was talking bout enrolling into a hip hop class. me and becca talked about it since ages ago. but nothing really happened except for the mrs.ang organised lesson at cuppage plaza. lol. that was quite funny now that i remember it. i kinda regret giving up ballet. why did i give it up?! gosh. its not like my piano is going anywhere too... :( i made a choice between ballet and piano. i should've just taken both on! maybe my ballet teacher overestimated my abilities and skipped me too many grades forward. i couldn't really cope at the time, so i just left. :( sigh. tried to recapture it by joining dance in sec sch. but it just wasn't the same. HAIYA. dreams not lived, have now gone.

piano is getting dusty. so are my playing fingers. i just don't like to fit my music into a box of exams and critiques by old angmohs. i sound mean. but its just the way i like playing. why can't i just play music that i like and explore more options instead of playing classical pieces as beautiful as they sound. i wouldn't mind playing aliens-landing-on-earth-and-seeing-everything-weirdly again. or chinese songs comprising of only the black keys. i think they sound great, or abstract, lol. but still great. "if music be the food of love, play on! -shakespeare"

i have no idea why i'm talking about all these stuffs. a

2010-07-26T03:27:00.000-07:00

Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed.

do i really wanna know?

2010-07-19T10:04:00.000-07:00

You're waiting for a train.

A train that will take you far away.

You can't be sure where it will take you.

But it doesn't matter.

Why?

Because we'll be together.

2010-07-12T09:17:00.000-07:00

wanted to go to universal studios tomorrow. but the tickets are all sold out! till dunno when. sigh. looks like i'll have to wait till next year or something...!

went online to search "things to do in singapore" and top places include the zoo, birdpark, singapore flyer, parks and reserves and mustafa shopping centre. apparently being a 24hr retail mall in the middle of little india is an attractive thing! LOL.

i kinda was disappointed over something this week. on hindsight, about my graduation. but its ok. i felt loved and that's what's impt.

been hanging out with musa and huilian alllooottt recently. cos we're just too free. actually. not really. huilian's really busy, i dont really know how she squeezes the time out to go out.

my mom suddenly asked my dad tonight why he called himself "nelson". he said :"i don't understand why i chose nelson. why ah?" and then he started laughing to himself. as usual, my mom and i stared and laughed.

i always get to rewatch random things i like on tv. like lost episodes, and a few house episodes that i thought was haunting. this time around, it was the dance by kayla and kupono on "so you think you can dance" to gravity by sara bareilles. it was as deep and amazing as the first time i saw it. its the kind of dance that draws you to it, brings you in, and lets you out, different.

grad photos are up!

i realised, i have taken on this new "way" of blogging with paragraphs of random snippets when whatever random thoughts/happenings-during-the-day come to my mind.

not like i should care bout what "way" i'm blogging since i'm the most faithful reader of my own blog and i more or less already know what i wrote/am trying to write.

but its really interesting to see what you're blogged bout say... a month/year/day ago. how different you were then, or how much you haven't changed really. i still feel the same bout certain stuffs. i might change the way i phrase certain things. but all in all, i am kinda happy at where i am at now. thinking bout the larger things in life ain't really my thing. but i am trying to get the decision made and get it over and done with!

tim came over for dinner today. my mom cooked chicken curry, wongbok teochew soup, steamed seabass with hongkong fish sauce and prawn with oats. what a scrumptous meal. i have a tummy ache after cos i ate soooo much. but its fine. i like going grocery shopping with my mom sometimes. we do funny things. and argue bout random things like how she feels i should put the basket in some obscure corner. but i feel i shouldn't cos people might take out stuff and i wanna carry it. and she says its too heavy and we haven't paid for those anyway. and my theory is that we pick out the freshest of the bunch of fruits/seafood/meat etc. people who want the easy way out just take what others pick out! won't we be left with 2nd best, or worst items? why take the risk. just carry la....

i am feeling sleepy. think i'll turn it. i've been sleeping alot these few days. lol. i need sleep. good night world.

still. i can't wait for tmr. (:

2010-07-11T08:05:00.000-07:00

10 July 2010

10am

UCC

Commencement 2010

to be honest, i was more nervous than i thought i'd be when i got up on stage. but all went pretty much smoothly!

thanks to hazelina, musa, ramen and joonkiat for coming! (: i really really appreciated it.

oh and thanks to musa again for pre-grad shopping.

and thanks to all the well wishers, namely huilian who couldn't be there, and hir too cos of work! and mengtiak! (:

my dad was in charge of my camera...so you can pretty much predict how the photos will turn out. lol.

had a great lunch/day after with jk hazelina and ended the day with musa and ramen (:

ramen bought me the graduate teddy bear that costs a whopping $59.90 and a single rose. (:

my aunt ordered a bouquet to be delivered the night before and made my mom bring it for me on the day itself. (: thanks aunt doris!

although all of them kept making fun that i didn't have enough friends and should randomly take pictures with strangers. i felt really happy and loved that even 1 person showed up (: and they are the most impt people to me anyways.

so thank God for giving me these 3 years and thanks to those who matter. you know who you are (:

2010-06-27T07:52:00.000-07:00

i suddenly feel like watching edward scissorhands again. though i think it would be my nth time watching it. maybe because i was listening to the grand finale soundtrack by danny elfman. two words. beautiful liberation. i love the voices. i love the build up. everything about the few notes when edward was cutting the ice sculpture with her dancing in the snowflakes was simply magical.

one day i will snuggle in, watch it and cry again. left alone atop a hill. with only memories of her beauty. giving her the gift of snow. knowing he is loved.

i shall learn my lesson.

want to - sugarland.

2010-06-24T09:27:00.000-07:00

what i learnt from watching taboo today. humans are the most adaptable species. we can get used to the harshest conditions. so i guess mine's not considered harsh at all. but its still unfavourable to me. nonetheless. extrapolating from all the rest of human experience. i'll get used to it.

slowly but surely to my distaste.

sigh. :(

2010-06-22T21:49:00.000-07:00

The Tiffany Filigree Heart and Key Pendant Series

Inspired by archival designs, this collection of ornate hearts features the word "Tiffany" spelled out in the petals.

my mum got me the silver one. isn't it so beautiful. the most expensive jewellery i've got so far ever. my mom was adamant on getting me something like a key to symbolise the big 2-1. but yeah. subtle key, beautiful heart lock. love it! (: my mum says i must wear it everyday. which i will! (: i love you mum!

wouldn't mind getting one of the charms with personalized engravings though. next tiffany's buy! next occasion la. maybe the big 3-0. lol. nah. i definitely won't wait tt long.

2010-06-22T09:36:00.000-07:00

watched toy story 3 the other day. it was superb. the wait was so worthwhile. toy story 1, cried when they got left behind. toy story 2 cried when jessie was telling her story with sarah mclachlan. toy story 3, cried when they were in the incinerator and they realised there was no hope! and also when andy was playing with bonnie. damn sad can! so bittersweet. ugh.

this is a MUST watch. pixar's best. my favourite animation ever. i wanna own all 3 man. so i can watch it again and again and again and again. we could have a toy story marathon!

spanish buzz was sooooo funny. LOL. i was really laughing out loud and i really dont do that quite often in movies. the guy a seat away from me. he was laughing really really out loudly. quite annoying at times. but oh well. good movie nonetheless!

ken and barbie...lol. ken epic fail. but at least at the end he truly looooved barbie.

Ken: Okay, now you start.

Barbie: I...

Ken: love...

Barbie: you! Oh!

Ken: See? That time I said "love"! Okay, now me first.

Barbie: Ooh! Okay okay okay...

Ken: I...

Barbie: love...

Ken: you! You see what I mean? It changes every time!

Barbie: You are so smart!

ya so smart. lol. hilarious. i'd rather have a dumb faithful ken than a smart flirtatious one though.

anyways. why'd have to take away lil bo peep. poor woody doesn't have his love whereas buzz gets his. so unfair! wheezy the penguin's gone too. i like his asthma like wheezes. quite funny. RC also gone. he always dies halfway. think he cmi if he joined the escape. lol. and lenny the binoculars. would've helped them alot in the escape la! write off for what...:(

i heart toy story

2010-06-20T22:02:00.000-07:00

10-13 June

Church Camp 2010 in Melaka

(random snippets that i can remember)

first time since penang tt i went. organizing the finale night was fulfilling, kinda tiring. hmm... wished i had more time to explore the surrounding areas though, and try the gula-teh. which wasn't open when cas brought us there. dang.

anyways, the sermons were pretty... hmm... special. lol. infering from the various fb comments and satire, i guess everyone else who had fb and went for camp pretty much felt the same. lol.

didn't really take many photographs. happens when your friend's like the official photographer. might as well let her take everything right.

took a 15min bubble bath. shiok. but better not do it again. v.waste water.

wanted to swim! but no time :( the pool looked real nice. non-cloudy water for the first time in a long time!

ohoh! when mel, joee, cas and i went to the other wing of the palawan dream mall, there was these few girls, malay i think, who were sooooo scantily clad and on stage, dancing nobody by wonder girls. like getai. wah... all the men all lau nuah. goodness. the girls really didn't care leh. could see their butt. and nearing the end, they bent down all the way, giving my side of the stage a good view of their rear and more... and.. let's just say it was near r21. esp the front girl whose pathetic excuse for a pair of safety shorts rode up all the way barely covering anything.

shopping there was quite productive. (: esp at the bugis-street-esque area and FOS. i heart FOS. lol. bought like 3 new dresses and 3 new tops!

oh and actually, the high-part of the finale night for me was actually grace's mom and dad going on stage and showing off their dance moves. grace would be proud. lol. followed by joee, desmond and aaron going on toe dance snsd songs. you'd be amazed at how boys can dance girls' dances so well.

20 June 2010 Sunday

the first time jocelyn and i went out together and didn't buy a single thing. we. were. shocked.
had a good time. she's going to korea for 6 wks. on exchange. lucky her. :( summer leh. shop till you drop. she keeps asking me to go over. free accomodation cos she'll get like an apartment by herself. own toilet, own washing machine, own kitchen leh! student accomodation in korea so good one sia. i really wanna go leh. it'll be the first time i'll take a plane by myself. and she says it'll be cheap. maybe $500 including tax for the ticket. and she'll take me shopping! + i'll get to spend more time and sit ALL the rides at the theme park this time round instead of running around lotte world with the girls on the bus like mad women cos it was closing soon. the last time i went to korea, it was winter and we had like what... 1 and a half hr to shop. i wanna go i wanna go i wanna go!!! any kind soul wanna sponsor me? (:

eh... i think i need help with my mp3. i wanna get ipod touch. but how do i transfer all my songs from my current dying ipod video over to the new ipod? is it even possible. i printscreened my itunes list just in case i have to get every single song if it can't be done. which i prolly won't. cos i'm too lazy.lol. and how to dl games and stuffs. haiya. why must my ipod video die on me :(

2010-06-07T00:34:00.000-07:00

did i mention that i love the new starhub HD cable thingy. HBO/Warner movies rock.

i recently watched "City of Angels" with my mom one of the nights. starring Meg Ryan and Nicholas Cage. he's an angel btw. its nice. predictable, somewhat cheesy. but still, it was haunting. the ending especially. its the kind of show that people will have reactions from both extremes. either hate it and think its uber cheesy, or love it and think its uber deep. i think i kinda love it. maybe because there were soooo many close up shots of Meg Ryan's light blue eyes and perfect porcelain face. and so many scenes with celestial beauty that's on earth. i love the soundtrack too. "in the arms of an angel" playing when Meg Ryan and Nicholas Cage we together was definitely and "Aww" moment. and at the end "its in the way you love me" by Shania Twain. i've always thought that song was very "karaoke" but it sounded really soothing and quaintly apt.

then i watched "Notting Hill". thus came the famous line where Julia Roberts, the crazy hard-to-get actress tells Hugh Grant, the boring book store keeper that "she's just a girl, standing infront of a boy, asking him to love her." classic moment. loved this show too... even though i think hugh grant's room mate is really really disgusting. this seemingly boring romantic comedy is really quite hysterical. it was really nice that the film centres around the residential areas in london. it kinda takes you into their lives. what its like to live there. and yes, i loved how it ended too. sitting on the bench, taking an afternoon nap and reading a book.

i wanna do that too.

2010-06-03T07:54:00.000-07:00

how apt. that the episode of house i just rewatched has fiona apple's voice seeping in at the end singing "why try to change me now".

:( i somehow feel like i was just being toyed. cry wolf. one day i won't come running.

2010-05-26T04:45:00.000-07:00

FEELING FAT. NEED. TO. EXERCISE.

and some people like my mom will say:"finally."

sigh.

seeing numbers everyday at work and scanning resumes for my aunt. quite frustrating sometimes to see the words they use. i shall not do that when i apply for jobs next time.

Lost season finale on mon was epic. alvin didn't understand! hohoho. i understood!! straightaway! without even reading the explanation! yay. watched it at musa's house and he cooked spaghetti with meatballs and shepherd's pie! (: i was just happy that in the end, everyone got together. no matter how tough their life was afterwards, at least, in the end, they were together. all the couples. so freaking sweet. i'm gonna watch the episode over and over again.

went to timbre@artshouse on tues again for yannick's farewell. 53a was playing. had a fun time making fun of yannick. had a not-so-fun time being snapped unglam pictures of. :( i hope they don't post it online.

FOG camp @ church for the very last time tmr. kinda nostalgic. and very looking forward to it. my oasis away from "life".

2010-05-20T20:18:00.000-07:00

What I've Been Doing. Recently. (at work now writing countless cheques out. taking a break just so that i don't botch the numbers man. its dangerous writing so many cheques)

went to tioman from 10-13th may. and like hazel said, paya seems to be the nicest place, prob cos it was my first, even with my sec sch friends. had lotsa fun snorkelling and what nots. view the pictures on facebook! it was such a big group. 14 of us. namely, me, haz, ger, hir, ramen, weemeng, ys, willie, laura, weelee, alvin, shuyi, pk, jk. the main game of the trip was "murderer", or as they like to call it, a combination of indian poker and murderer, "indian murderer". racist, i know. LOL. it was a nice time together with my friends. didn't get to eat sanlow beehoon though. its like everytime i go with my friends, they'll just be too lazy to go over. HAIYA. i shall just go with my dad. i know he won't be too lazy to go over. (:

sooo many activities ahead. cell camp, church camp. both of which i'm part of the planning committee. should be a nice time at malacca. its been a looong time since i went for church camp (: BUT there's only 4 people from FOG. cas, mel, joee and me. SADDED. last yr, when i didn't go, almost the ENTIRE FOG was there. sigh.

nando's on tues with mt, lianghe, kaijun and hui. queued for more than an hour, went in, ate the chicken (quite nice la. thanks mt!) and felt like i didn't eat anything at all. lol. hui kept saying we should go opp and eat ajisen ramen. hahaha. went for desert at the street outside the shopping mall. WAH. the durian puree with pomelo sago is like EPIC. SHIOK. so thick and nice. comparable to merchant court durian puree! i eat until i could feel the heat, but neh mind. it was worth it.

went to butter on wed for an "impromptu" birthday celebration for musa. lotsa nice show to watch ah. scandal. with a combination of musa and marcus, scandalous is an understatement.

steamboat at bugis yest with pk, jk, hir, willie, ger, alvin, ramen. pk's been wanting to have an outing but all fail. lol. only this went through. i wanna goooo shoppping! but i didn't wake up! hir bought a cute skirt, and ger bout nice shoes! i waaaannnttt! :(

2010-05-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

tonight, might potentially be the official last/2nd last night of my stay in king edward vii hall. this place, the people i've met, the bonds i've forged, the things i went through here, as a person, as a girl becoming a woman will never ever be forgotten. these 3 years in nus, in this hall, has humbled me. it has changed my life in a way that i could've never imagined and i'm thanking god for that every single day.

with fifi sleeping beside me now, it dawned on me that this is the last time that he can sleep in a room that's entirely mine. littered with all my rubbish and hair. messed up with all the food and paper and random stuffs. which probably provoked what i'm feeling now and this "emo" post as some might say.

its been a whirlwind of events, an emotional roller coaster. it feels like a dream. 3 years has passed and i feel like i want 3 years more.

without being here, having my room f210, f310. i'd never have met the wonderful people i've met. and come to love the people that i will miss soooo much. i could name all of you. but the girls. THE GIRLS. i love you girls so much i can't even begin to describe how i feel about leaving. so i needn't even say what i'm doing as i'm typing all these.

in no particular order:

hazelina

the one i confide so much in, the one who knows things about me that maybe i might not even know myself. the one who always keeps me in check, but never fails to encourage me whenever i fall. the one who slowly but surely opened up to trusting me as much as i did in her. you mentioned you felt a certain kind of love towards your friends, a bizarre strong powerful love. and that's exactly what we have. so thank you for everything we've shared, the laughter, the disagreements and the tears. i'll never be the person i am without you.

hiromi

the one i have so much fun with just being crazy and being myself. i let loose all my comical antics, all my inhibitions just go away somehow when i'm this crazy person. cos i know, whatever i do can never ever trump what she does to make me laugh. its a very important thing, i realised to have someone who can make you laugh, because its what keeps you going. so thanks for being my source of laughter and joy, whenever i feel down and just barge into your room. i feel so comfortable in my own skin with you around because i know you'll accept whatever i do with a laugh. you literally are my joy.

huilian

the one who understands me through and through because of our similarities. we share adversities and a true friend is born from that. i find that i can never really get angry with you somehow. even when you're sooo late, or you forget stuffs. just because you're you. seeing you sometimes, just brings a sense of familiarity. i feel like i'm home. you feel like home to me. i'm glad i didn't stay that 1 sem, cos i became closer to you. i will still continue to randomly drop by your place, to use the toilet or visit your new hamster, you can count on that. anyone who has you as a friend, is blessed beyond words.

geraldine

the one whom i know truly cares for us despite the "hard" exterior. deep down, i know you love us don't you? i can always count on you for insecticide, for motherly care or for just a room that i can study in cos i just cannot focus in mine anymore. i guess we've seen you change from a clean freak and touch-phobia person into the "in-love" girl that you're in now, and i'm glad. means hazel can hug you more now without being shoved away. you're the faithful loyal friend who's never afraid to stick up for us, don't squirm... but i truly love you too.

all good things come to an end, and i guess my life here in kevii has just reached the last stop. so i will get off, taking with me these precious precious memories that i will never ever throw away because all these, EVERY SINGLE PERSON that i've made friends with, made a difference in my life.

i love all of you. for real.

2010-05-03T07:44:00.000-07:00

i don't resent ending exams relatively later than the rest. not at all now that i think about it. how could i? when i've got the best loving people just cushioning me with care.

was down on thurs, had warm frothy soyabean to drink.

was fine on fri, still had warm frothy soya bean, charsiew bao and yewcharkway to eat.

was fine on sun, had escorts all the way to west end for asian cuisine + a bonus of awfully chocolate dark chocolate icecream.

was fine today, had sanlow beehoon all the way from johor bahru. and potentially a scrumptuous supper if someone doesn't forget.

but nonetheless, the intentions were there.

i heart everybody

2010-05-01T00:20:00.000-07:00

great video.

so my parents came over again to deliver food. i'm starting to feel like a pampered little girl. i probably am one. my friends get inadvertently pampered too. which is a good thing at this period of time no?

getting ready for my looooonnnngggg day with my faithful loyal study buddy yoon hui lian. yay. i finally found a study buddy.

just found out that isaac landed in nuh. imma go visit him tmr with cas and gang. poor thing :(

the end of exams could not come any sooner. but then again, i want time to pass by real slowly after. so i can enjoy my time to the fullest until oh well... until i can't enjoy la. i have this tiny weeny nagging feeling. that maybe, just maybe, there's a hint of regret or realisation that this prolly isn't what was wanted, or what was expected.

i suddenly thought of what pastor stanley mentioned last sunday. bout the bodies we'll get when we get to heaven. it most definitely won't be the ill/weak body we have when we pass away. he put forth an idea which he got from someone else that we'll get the body of when we're 33, since we're supposed to be as christlike as possible when we get to heaven. jesus died when he was 33. what'll happen though, if we pass before we're 33?

i wonder where i'll be when i'm 33. its more than a decade away.

Feels like a milestone

Being in my 30s

Friends become mothers and fathers

With little ones of their own

So and so's a doctor

A lawyer, an accountant

So and so's got married

They've got a lifetime ahead

A beautiful lifetime ahead

We could have been schoolmates

Studying together

We could have had tea and scones

And talked about our day

You walk this path before me

Living close to guide me

You're thirsting for someone

To show a little care

You're hidden in faces everywhere

Everyone start a song to sing

It doesn't matter how sure it'd long

Just let each note ring

So long as we're in this key

33, the age that You died for me

Now here I am at 33

33, You crowned it with Your life upon a tree

The mystery of Your love for me

33 by corrinne may

2010-04-29T08:21:00.001-07:00

a prayer with my parents never fails to make me better.

thank god.

2010-04-26T05:44:00.001-07:00

i am taking a little break. ok maybe i've taken too many "little breaks". but whatever.

so melly asked me to be her date for the iron man 2 premiere on fri! sigh. how. dilemma. though i think i've already decided in my head to go. i'm not going home this weekend though, don't know how you feel bout tt melly. means you'll have to trudge home after the premiere by yourself!

church camp 2010 at malacca. I'M SO GOING. after so many years of "abstinence". i've forgotten how it felt like to be in a church camp! the hotel looookkksss gooooddd. woohoo. another fun time with the girls! and maybe some boys. the last church camp i went to was like what... KL/penang?! when i was... hmm.... 16/17?! woah. tt's bad. and there might be a youth track. all the better. no more lazing around on the pretence that it doesn't suit us "youths" eh. bunking with mel this time around, cas's with eugenia. FOG. who's going. please rally yourselves and get yourselves a room mate k! if enough youths go, we could get our own bus!! it'll be fun. so girls, pleeeaassee go. i'll give free bio tuition for whoever needs to study there. if i know how to do la that is.

please go to http://thefingerprints.livejournal.com for details please! rally there!

ugh. i should've gone for last year's camp. what was i doing.

2010-04-19T02:40:00.000-07:00

it has been raining horribly the past few days. thunderstorms and all. kinda reflecting certain aspects of my life, but most part are fine and dandy with green meadows littered with pert little white daisies. thank god.

i do however, really really hate the thunder that comes after the lightning. does it have to be so deafening?! its like magnified crackling of the bowling alley in heaven.

i heart serena's hair texture with blair's colour and waves. but i could never ever work center parting. cos my face's so fat. lol. one of these days, i'm gonna sew the trapeze embellished halter gown that blair wore for myself. since i really can't afford it. i WILL do it.

"other people's pain is funny, but mine hurts" - Bart Simpson

sometimes, its like the dry skin peeling of the nail groove or cuticle. i wanna peel it out so much, instead of just toying with it, but i know it'd hurt so much during and after i'd rather just not do it. because my pain hurts. you'd know what i mean when i say it will just resurface again. no matter how much hand moisturizer i can plough onto my fingers. sigh.

justice is really just the realisation that the hurt from someone's attack would be so much more painful than the pleasure i get from attacking someone. so we come to a consensus of not hurting each other and keep to it. great.

2010-04-17T06:21:00.000-07:00

TIME TO STUDY.

2010-04-11T02:26:00.001-07:00

she's too good. esp the highs. love the breaks in her voice.

2010-04-11T01:53:00.001-07:00

i just wanna say a big thank you to ELEANOR HOLAHEHOLAHO for calling me all the way from sydney just to tell me God loves me and she loves me too. i know i can be so back-and-forth on these things.

eleanor ho, if you're reading this. I LOVE YOU.

and i will pass you your self-made christmas bag as soon as you get back. AGAIN. lol.

2010-04-08T23:17:00.000-07:00

i can finally stop singing "all by myself".

cos i love the way you say good morning.

cos i love the way you call me baby.

cos i love you more than i could ever promise.

and you take me the way i am.

2010-04-05T04:23:00.001-07:00

On a hill far away, stood an old rugged cross,

The emblem of suff'ring and shame;

And I love that old cross where the dearest and best

For a world of lost sinners was slain.

So I'll cherish the rugged cross,
Till my trophies at last I lay down'
I will cling to the old rugged cross,
And exchange it some day for a crown.

Oh, that old rugged cross so despised by the world

Has a wondrous attraction for me;

For the dear Lamb of God left his glory above,

To bear it to dark Calvary.

In the old rugged cross, stained with blood so divine,

A wondrous beauty I see;

For 'twas on that old cross Jesus suffered and died,

To pardon and sanctify me.

To the old rugged cross I will ever be true,

Its shame and reproach gladly bear;

Then he'll call me some day to my home far away,

Where his glory forever I'll share.

2010-03-30T00:40:00.000-07:00

things look different at night don't they? sometimes they look more sinister, sometimes more poetic, sometimes more peaceful. i guess it all depends on your frame of mind. took this picture last night cos the moon was so captivating. when everyone else is asleep, you're the only one awake. its like the moment belongs to you and you alone. this scene was yours, no one else's. i like that feeling. its like god painted the sky for you.

i made jocelyn wait for me online to finish showering before going offline. lol. we did a funny if-i'm-not-back-within-20-mins-call-my-phone-and-if-i-don't-answer-call-the-police routine. i can totally imagine what my mother would say, or rather, scream, if she knew i was bathing at such an unearthly hour. which i normally would be totally fine with if i didn't have thoughts put into my mind. bizarre thoughts starts coming and i'm in for it man. i promise i will NEVER ever bathe tt late again. i prob didn't even get all the soap off.

so she asked whether i believed there was "the one". we're always liking people we shouldn't be liking. lol. oh well. someday our princes will come. i think i do believe in "the one". how do you not? how can the man you marry not be "the one"? how can the father of your children not be "the one"? how can the person you're gonna spend your entire life with not be "the one"? there has to be "the one". and i guess we're both romantic fanatics. cos when i mentioned "bless the broken road" by rascal flatts, we both agreed tt's the song the probably epitomizes our love lives. i shall play that song at my wedding. like during the beginning when guests are pouring in.

and i'm currently in love with this song! the way i am by ingrid michaelson. i hate the mtv though. too many clown faces. i hate clowns. they should've just used masks. but i guess they were trying to get a point across. why be in relationship where you're gonna be like clowns to each other? full of acting and pretense. love me the way i am.

If you were falling, then I would catch you

You need a light, I'd find a match

Cos I love the way you say good morning

And you take me the way I am

If you are chilly, here take my sweater

Your head is aching; I'll make it better

Cos I love the way you call me baby

And you take me the way I am

I'd buy you Rogaine when you start losing all your hair

Sew on patches to all you tear

Cos I love you more than I could ever promise

And you take me the way I am

You take me the way I am

2010-03-26T20:57:00.000-07:00

went to daily scoop AGAIN. after i just went on sun, less than a week! i'm truly worthy of being in the cas-ttm-mel-isaac gang of dailyscoop loyals.

this wasn't what i ordered, but without the tiramisu, it will be. oh well, what can i say, i'm a creature of habit. but cas'll be proud to know tt i didn't get a simply chocolate to-go pack, but lemon sherbet! the last time i brought huilian there, i ate lemon too. ok. its becoming a habit. but its so refreshing its addictive.

there were soooooo many high class cute darlings there when we went last night. the babies were so cute, the girls were so pretty with their hair all long and curly. the boys were so adorable with their blue jumpers and what nots. it was one of the cupcake's birthdays. i want one too. lol. i want a cupcake. i want a chubby lil sweeeeeet cupcake. :( but its not like its something i can buy. fifi'll be my pseudo cupcake for now.

been looking for this song, the song at the end of alice in wonderland. they used a fake madhatter! and she runs away just to play the piano beside the mushroom. lol. random.

rebecca, jamie, linda if you're reading this. let's go karaoke next week please!! i'm listening to the chinese songs that we usually sing. the songs we cried to cos the mtv was just too touching. actually only me and becca. ha. right becca..." gao xiao" ah. "sha gua" ah. we can spam bsb songs and go crazy all over again!!! "we've got it going on for years....."

2010-03-25T10:30:00.001-07:00

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;

All mimsy were the borogoves,

And the mome raths outgrabe.

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!

The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!

Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun

The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand:

Long time the manxome foe he sought—

So rested he by the Tumtum tree,

And stood awhile in thought.

And as in uffish thought he stood,

The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,

Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,

And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through

The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!

He left it dead, and with its head

He went galumphing back.

"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?

Come to my arms, my beamish boy!

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"

He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;

All mimsy were the borogoves,

And the mome raths outgrabe.

2010-03-24T09:37:00.000-07:00

this is hilarious. anyone knows where i can watch full SNL episodes??

2010-03-24T09:14:00.001-07:00

so watched alice in wonderland in both 2d and 3d sometime last two weeks. it was GOOOODDDD (: i fell in love with johnny depp all over again. the dynamic duo johnny depp and tim burton will never ever fail to create movie magic. (:

there's so much more layers underneath the surface of the story. the story behind each story is just as compelling as the the main story.

2010-03-16T05:35:00.000-07:00

i was listening to a myriad of songs on the way there, but none of them seemed apt for the mood i was in until it shuffled to "safe in a crazy world" by corrinne may. i literally bit my lip so i wouldn't cry. i scrolled to her playlist and really. so many songs she sang just hit me right in my heart. its like she was saying she understood. i was talking to god, asking him to help me through this. maybe this will be the year when i can face ahkong with a smile. but it didn't happen as i planned. its been 5 years since he left us in 2005. but somehow, it still feels like it was just yesterday when i am there. i remember looking at the painted verse on the wall:

^"38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

the first time i was there. romans 8. i remember sitting at the same balcony, trying to not think about it. but now i wanna think about it because i don't want to forget any shred of memory that has ahkong in it. i still have the pink scissors.

i didn't really know what to say when i stood there, except the usual about how we're all doing. i know he'll hear me, along with mickey, rocky, isaac, britney, nicky and all our previous pets. since ahkong passed, i've envisioned him staying in a house with all our passed pets too. they'll be there to keep him company. everytime i'm there, i feel like i'm letting him down when i leave. like i can only fork out so little of my time to see him once/twice a year?

i listened to "safe in a crazy world" again. i cleaned the tile. so dusty.

it really is one of those things that never heal. you'll never ever feel the pain lessen, because it won't. it just won't. and i am happy that it doesn't because it means that i will not forget how much i love my ahkong and how much i miss him.

I try to smile my tears away,
I try to keep my cool.
Oh but one more door gets in my way
I feel like such a fool
Trampled and bitter,
My heart just wants to bleed and stop believing in me.

It feels like nothing is for certain
and that nothing comes for free
When they're lowering the curtains to the theatre of my dreams
I stumble and I crumble and I'm sinking to my knees but you
You cradle me

You keep me flying
You keep me smiling
You keep me safe in a crazy world
You understand me
Embrace my fragility
You keep me safe in a crazy world
And in your arms I find the strength to believe in me again

Noise keeps chasing me
No matter where I go
Oh and life likes pretending that it's on a TV show
When it's hard to tell what's real
From what the world just wants to preach
You are the voice I seek

You keep me flying
You keep me smiling
You keep me safe in a crazy world
You understand me
Embrace my fragility
You keep me safe in a crazy world
And in your arms I find the strength to believe in me again

'cause when I'm wrapped up in your arms
Nothing else can touch me
What a wonderful way to recharge
I feel like I can breathe again

2010-03-15T02:51:00.000-07:00

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

This riddle is famous, although it's the rarefied kind of fame that entails most people never having heard of it. It comes from Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. Alice is at the tea party with the March Hare, the Mad Hatter, and the Dormouse, when apropos of pretty much nothing the Hatter pops the question above. Several pages of tomfoolery ensue, and then:

"Have you guessed the riddle yet?" the Hatter said, turning to Alice again.
"No, I give it up," Alice replied. "What's the answer?"
"I haven't the slightest idea," said the Hatter.
"Nor I," said the March Hare.
Alice sighed wearily. "I think you might do something better with the time," she said, "than wasting it in asking riddles that have no answers."

At this point most of us are thinking: Ho-ho, that Lewis Carroll, is he hilarious or what? But inevitably you get a few losers who say: Well, OK, but I still want to know why a raven is like a writing desk. One sighs wearily. Guys! It's a joke! The answer is that there isn't any answer!

Oh, they say. (Pause.) But why is a raven like a …

Lewis Carroll himself got bugged about this so much that he was moved to write the following in the preface to the 1896 edition of his book:

Enquiries have been so often addressed to me, as to whether any answer to the Hatter's Riddle can be imagined, that I may as well put on record here what seems to me to be a fairly appropriate answer, viz: 'Because it can produce a few notes, tho they arevery flat; and it is never put with the wrong end in front!' This, however, is merely an afterthought; the Riddle, as originally invented, had no answer at all.

Did this discourage people? No. They figured, that dope Carroll, he's too dumb to figure out his own riddle, setting aside the halfhearted attempt just quoted. So they ventured answers of their own, some of the more notable of which are recorded in Martin Gardner's The Annotated Alice and More Annotated Alice:

Because the notes for which they are noted are not noted for being musical notes. (Puzzle maven Sam Loyd, 1914)
Because Poe wrote on both. (Loyd again)
Because there is a B in both and an N in neither. (Get it? Aldous Huxley, 1928)
Because it slopes with a flap. (Cyril Pearson, undated)

Not bad for amateurs. But the real answer, to which the careers of Poe and Carroll bear ample testimony, is that you can baffle the billions with both.

Postscript: In 1976 Carroll admirer Denis Crutch pointed out that in the 1896 preface quoted above, the author had originally written: "It is nevar put with the wrong end in front." Nevar of course is raven spelled backward. Big joke! However, said joke didn't survive the ministrations of the proofreaders, who, thinking they understood the author's intentions better than the author, changed nevar to never in subsequent editions. The indignities we authors suffer! Sure, we make up for it in money and groupies, but still, if in some book (e.g., one of mine) you come across a line that really clanks, be assured: It was funny before.

2010-03-01T00:47:00.000-08:00

BACKSTREET BOYS CONCERT WAS ONE OF THE MOST PRECIOUS MOMENTS OF MY LIFE.

IT WAS TEN THOUSAND MILLION TIMES AWESOME.

I LOVE THEM.

I LOVE BRIAN.

I LOVE AJ.

I LOVE HOWIE.

I EVEN LOVE NICK.

WHEN WE WENT IN, THE ATMOSPHERE WAS ELECTRIFYING. FOR ME, AT LEAST SINCE IT WAS MY FIRST BSB CONCERT. I WAS SOOO FREAKING EXCITED. BECCA CAME UP WITH A PLAN THAT THE MOMENT SOMEONE ELSE RAN UP TO THE FRONT, WE'D GRAB EACH OTHERS' HANDS AND DO THE SAME. AND WE DID EXACTLY THAT. JANELLE - JAMIE - REBECCA - ME - JK. WE RAN TO THE FRONT, BUT WE LOST JAMIE AND JANELLE. SO JK BECCA AND I ENDED UP STANDING RIGHT SMACK IN THE MIDDLE IN THE FRONT FOR BOUT AN HOUR BEFORE WE GOT CHASED AWAY!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!! I WAS SO CLOSE TO THEM!!!!! SO REACHABLE. I COULD SEE THE SWEAT ON BRIAN'S FACE. AND I WAS SCREAMING LIKE A SIAO ZHABOR FOR HIM.

"BRIAN!!!!! WAVE!!!!!" AND HE DID JUST THAT. OH MY GOODNESS. I FELT MY HEART FLY INTO THE SKY. AND WHEN JK SAID THERE WERE MOMENTS THAT HE THOUGH BRIAN WAS LOOKING STRAIGHT AT US, I CANNOT HELP BUT ALMOST WANNA CRY!!!! I'M SO FREAKING HAPPY. BRIAN KEPT POSING FOR OUR CAMERAS, WAVING, SMILING AND LOOKING SO HAPPILY AT US. I HAD EYE CONTACT. I SWEAR. I DID. I REALLY DID. I LOVE YOU BRIAN!!!! I WANNA MARRY YOU!!!!!

HOWIE WAS SOOOOOOO CUTE. SOOOOOO CUTE. HE WINKED AT US!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. SO HOT. I CAN'T STAND IT. THERE WAS A SONG, WHEN HE WAS LIKE INTERACTING WITH THE FANS AND HE WAS LIKE BLOWING KISSES OR SOMETHING. THEN NICK CAME OVER TO WAG HIS FINGER AT HIM COS HE'S MARRIED AND HOWIE LOOKED AT HIS RING AND DID AN :"OH YEAH..." THING. SO FREAKING CUTE!!!!!!!!

AJ WAS LAGI BETTER. HE TOOK A CAMERA FROM THE CAMERAMAN AND SHOT US SHOOTING HIM, SCREAMING FOR HIM, HYPERVENTILATING (OK MAYBE THAT WAS ONLY ME). BUT YEAH. IT WAS DAMN FUNNY. I'LL BE IN A PHOTO IN BACKSTREET BOY'S CAMERA. WHAT MORE CAN I ASK MORE?!?!?! WHAT. TELL ME WHAT. AH!!!!!!!!!

I SEEM TO HAVE LOTSA NICE PHOTOS OF NICK. EVEN THOUGH I DON'T REALLY LIKE HIM THAT MUCH, BUT THE ATMOSPHERE WAS CONTAGIOUS LA. SO MANY GIRLS DOWN THERE SCREAMING FOR HIM LIKE SIAO. SO I SCREAM ALSO LO. THERE WAS ONCE, HE CAME DOWN TO PASS THE FLOWER. WAH. SIAO. EVERYBODY PUSH TO TT SIDE LIKE SIAO. THEN WHEN THEY THREW THE TOWELS. ACTUALLY BECCA GOT IT, AND SHE CAN SNATCH. BUT SHE DECIDED NOT TO. LOL. ACTUALLY NO NEED LA. ITS JUST A TOWEL. THE EXPERIENCE IS BETTER (:

WE GOT CHASED TO THE BACK AFTER AN HOUR OF STANDING IN FRONT. QUITE SAD. BUT NEH MIND. WE HAD FUN NONETHELESS. WE WERE SO FREAKING HAPPY. OH OH AND THERE WAS A FUNNY THING. THERE'S THIS SONG FROM THEIR NEW ALBUM, CALLED PDA, PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION. JOON KIAT THOUGHT THE ENTIRE TIME THAT IT WAS PDA, THE PALM DESKTOP THINGY. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! LMAO. WHEN WE WENT FOR A DRINK AFTER TT, HE TOLD US AND WE WERE LIKE...!

THE SONG GOES:"GIRL...I WANT YOUR PDA, YOUR PDA, YOU PDA"

HE SAID:" I WAS THINKING WHAT'S SO GOOD BOUT THE GIRL'S PDA."

LOL!!!!!! AND THE BEST PART IS HE LISTENS TO THEIR NEW ALBUM. MEANING ALL THESE TIME, HE THOUGHT IT WAS A PALM DESKTOP THINGY. ROFL.

IF YOU'RE WONDERING WHY I'M TYPING IN ALL CAPS. ITS BECAUSE I HAVE A CERTAIN FEELING I WANNA CONVEY AND THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I CAN CONVEY HOW STRONG I FEEL. JUST A LITTLE TASTE FOR YOU FOR THE MOST WONDERFUL NIGHT OF MY LIFE. AND I AM GLAD I SHARED IT WITH PEOPLE WHO APPRECIATES THE SAME THING AS I DO. AND WHO ARE WILLING TO DO THE CRAZIEST THINGS AS WELL. OK MAYBE NT SO MUCH FOR JK, SINCE HE WAS QUITE CALM AND COMPOSED THE ENTIRE TIME. HE NEEDS TO BE STEADY FOR VIDEO-ING. HAHAHA. MY VIDEOS ARE QUITE CUI. SINCE I WAS TRYING TO DANCE SCREAM JUMP AND VIDEO AT THE SAME TIME.

THEY SAID THEY COULD FEEL THE GROUND MOVE. NOT SURPRISING LOOKING AT THE AMT OF FANS JUMPING ARD LIKE SIAO!!! I COULD GO ON FOREVER SERIOUSLY.

I BOUGHT A SHIRT! THE PICS ARE BELOW. LEFT WITH M, BUT NEH MIND!!! I'M SO HAPPY!! ITS GONNA BE MY PRIZE. I'M GONNA WEAR IT PROUDLY. ARGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH!!!!!!!!!!

YOU KNOW WHAT'S THE BEST PART BOUT EVERYTHING?!

THEY'RE COMING BACK NEXT YEAR.

I'LL SO BE THERE CENTRE AND FRONT. THERE'S NO WAY THEY CAN CHASE ME BACK THE NEXT TIME ROUND. COS I'M ROW A IN THE MIDDLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE THE BACKSTREET BOYS!!!!!!

COMPLETE PHOTOS UPLOADED ON FACEBOOK. GO VIEW THEM!!!!!!! (:(:(:(: AND GET A SPECK OF THE EXPERIENCE FOR YOURSELF. (:(:(:(:(:

2010-02-27T05:15:00.000-08:00

终于可以在今天划上句点

一整夜翻阅过去画面

快想不起我们为何会诀别

只看到那双你送的鞋

走一步又一步

我才发现绕了个圈

走了好几年又回到原点

你送的礼物会不会太特别

毫不避讳那不安的传言

但渐行渐远习惯到没感觉

难道你早想要我走远

你送的礼物在此刻好体贴

陪我回忆把过往走一遍

穿了这些年难免会有污点

就像每段爱总会有终点

世上最残酷的恐怕是时间

困住人一切却还向前

干涸的眼再挤不出一点咸

爱到如此可悲的境界

走一步又一步

却跟不上你的脚步

你满意了为什么我却只想要哭

你说做自己吧我们都做回自己

不要再为爱受委屈

你送的礼物原来是一场劫

终于分别夙命一样准确

可笑到想要你赔给我时间

爱情有时廉价得可怜

光著脚我一路奔跑鲜血

泪水一路狂飙

收起我的骄傲

承认曾经备受煎熬

鞋上那记号只有你能明了

过了这一夜我就全忘掉

2010-02-26T00:49:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8y6hIbq4UDE&feature=PlayList&p=29F8ED152A3D02FB&index=3#watch-main-area

this part is so freaking funny!!! the way she says magic is MEH-GEEK. lol. aiyo. i dunno how to explain la. its just super funny. watch this part only also will laugh out loud!!

ok back to work. lol!

2010-02-23T06:42:00.000-08:00

I see you walking over here, can’t look away.

I see you left a trail of broken hearts on your way to me.

I try to not let it show, but I know that you know.

There’s something about the way you make me feel, I’m ready to confess.

They checked my heart and it’s terminally ill, Baby, I’m a mess

I’m done trying to deny that without you I’ll be alright.

Twenty four hours a day ain’t really enough, no way

to get to know you from “head to toe”

you know how to captivate, please, baby, don’t make me wait

I’m at your door, I need more.

You break me down every time you make a move. (or when you don't)

Without a sound, you make me come unglued. (not so extreme la)

And I don’t know what you did to me, (i really don't know)

and I don’t care what the doctors say, (i didn't see one)

cause no matter what I do, (or don't do)

I can’t stay away from you. (its kinda sorta true)

2010-02-21T09:39:00.000-08:00

hohoho. i am DOWN WITH LOVE. i really dislike those stupid taiwanese drama. but jerry yan is too cute to resist. plus its not the typical act cute high pitched female lead. ella's really cute too. hohoho. although there are some really exaggerating parts, as expected with taiwanese dramas, but its bearable since jerry's smile makes me smile and ella's laughter makes me laugh.

ohoh i just have to add something cos i just watched an episode yest. ep4. there were so many laugh out loud moments! esp one where he wanted to spend more time with her, so he helped her with a side job to do some surveys. turns out, the survey was about pads, and he had to give them out while ella asked the survey questions. all the girls went over to him because he was so cute to take the pads, and pushed ella out of the picture totally. she tried squeezing back in to ask them to do the survey, but cannot! so in the end she gave up and shouted (in direct translation): "FEED FISH AH?!" at that moment, i really lol.

2010-02-18T07:39:00.000-08:00

so...went to the butter factory last night cos buddhi was dj-ing and we apparently were supposed to have some vip thing. met with some kinks, but it was alright. saw buddhi for like 5 mins. and then he was gone cos his shift ended at 1230. gosh. nothing really special bout tt place. i don't know why people queue so long just to get in there. so small and not enough baggage space. had a good time only because of the company, not because of the place. there were a few hilarious people though. like a certain guy who dances like he's doing wushu and a certain guy who insists that basically everyone there is his idol. so funny.

watched "the imaginarium of dr.parnassus" with weiling tdy. its pronounced "par-nay-sus" btw, not "par-ner-sus". and may i just say that lily cole is hot. i never ever thought she was hot, even on runways, and seeing her in certain adverts. but she is really. in this film. and johnny depp. for the brief moment that he was there. he could've charmed me into doing whatever. i don't care. that shoe lady has got great taste in men, much so like mine. erm. ok, scratch that. maybe not so much great taste in men but great taste in men-we-can-only-dream-of. jude law was kinda forgettable and i just felt like punching colin ferrel. argh. johnny depp is <3.>

i have to start studying again. sigh. i'd better start if not i can forget about even passing the test.

oh oh. i watched the eng dubbed version of cj7. quite good leh. not cheesy at all. lol. and he became a soft toy. so cute. quite lag, but yeah. first time stephen chow not so crazy.

and huilian if you're reading, you'll understand when i say (quoting from good girls go bad) we met some girls who were acting like they were too hot to dance. ;)

bread and butter by adrian monk and trudy monk

2010-02-07T08:17:00.000-08:00

saying bread and butter when separating after holding hands due to some obstacle takes away the curse that might have been incurred due to the separation. this scene was so touching. i kept wondering what bread and butter meant. adrian and trudy monk equates to true love between a husband and a wife.

Sharona Fleming: Adrian, can I ask you something? If it's none of my buisiness, I promise I'll shut up.
Adrian Monk: [smiling] I doubt it.
Sharona Fleming: What did Trudy mean by 'bread and butter?'
Adrian Monk: Whenever Trudy and I were walking somewhere, we would hold hands, and if there was a lamp post or somebody walked between us and we had to let go for a second, she'd always say 'bread and butter'.
Sharona Fleming: So when she died...
Adrian Monk: Yeah, I think it was a message for me. She was saying, "I have to let go now for a little while, but it won't be forever."

2010-02-04T09:23:00.001-08:00

i'm sentimental, so i walk in the rain.

i've got some habits, even i can't explain.

could start for the corner, turn up in spain.

why try to change me now?

i sit and daydream, i've got daydreams galore.

cigarette ashes, there they go on the floor.

i'll go away weekends, leave my keys at the door.

why try to change me now?

why can't i be more conventional?

people talk, people stare, so i try.

but that's not for me, cause i can't see.

my kinda crazy world go passing me by.

so let people wonder, let them laugh, let them frown.

you know i'll love you till the moon's upside down.

don't you remember, i was always your clown.

why try to change me now?

i know i am supposed to be studying. but i really can't concentrate unless i get it out of my system. i've had a pretty fine week. no particular up or down. but its just some that one day when you feel like you feel nothing. i don't know. it just seems. nothing. thought abit about my future tdy, since i can't do honours. not here at least. considered my options, going overseas (aussie, where else?), or start working, be a teacher? nah. i really don't know. i am inclined towards spending some time overseas, like some wiseguy prob said, to 'zao zi ji'. i really need to find myself i guess. been listening to this wonderful song resung by fiona apple. its lovely. quaint (which actually means weird, but has a positive connotation). i wish i could be like her. go away weekends, leave my keys at my door. travel the world alone, meet new people, gain new experiences. stuck is what i feel. stuck studying, stuck financially, stuck in this rigid small little box that i seemed to have got trapped in over the years. so where's my chance? where's the spoon that i could use maybe to dig my way out?

i just wanna disappear for awhile. just a little while.

2010-02-01T18:15:00.000-08:00

You breathed infinity into my world

And time was lost up in a cloud and in a whirl.

We dug a hole in the cool grey earth and lay there for the night.

Then you said, "wait for me we'll fly the wind,

We'll grow old and you'll be stronger without him" but oh,

Now my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,

But I was alive and now I've drowned.

So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song

So they can tell me I was wrong.

But they weren't there beneath your stare,

And they weren't stripped 'till they were bare of

Any bindings from the world outside that room.

And they weren't taken by the hand

And led through fields of naked land

Where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away.

So I couldn't say "no".

You sighed and I was lost in you, weeks could've past for all I knew.

You were there blanket of the over-world and so I couldn't say,

I wouldn't say "no". But they all said, "you're too young to even know,

Just don't let it grow and you'll be stronger without him"

But oh, now, my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,

But I was alive and now I've drowned.

So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song

So they can tell me I was wrong.

2010-01-26T06:05:00.000-08:00

This is what it means to be held

How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life

And you survive

This is what it is to be loved and to know

That the promise was when everything fell

We'd be held

2010-01-21T20:40:00.001-08:00

what i do when i'm bored in hall is totally hilarious. photobooth! i have my doubts whether the thermal camera on photobooth is actually functioning. and i have disproved my doubts. look at the following HILARIOUS photo. i was really laughing while taking the photo.

i am so not hot, but my buck teeth is!!!! hahahahaha. THEY'RE HOT. i must show my dad this photo, then he'll stop bugging me to put braces on.

2010-01-20T10:43:00.001-08:00

started watching a new show. its quite obvious what it is, but honestly, i think its great. the way they upped "high school musical" and show people that musicals don't have to be cheesy and fake and all rainbows and flowers. real issues, real songs, real singing. tt's what i call a musical.

plus, it helped that the cast is way better-looking than the cast of high school musical. older, and less teen-craze-disney-channel kind. can't stand the disney channel franchises. it would take me a thesis paper to properly express my intolerance towards people past a certain age who still, can't seem to fathom a world beyond disney channel nonsense. degrading the already eroded mind of people nowadays. the so called depiction of moral and values through fantasies and falsified situations makes people who watch these shows go:"hey... this moral and values thing can only happen with magic, or with people who have everything or with people who have perfect lives. common people like us can just heck it." so what are they really teaching kids? old school disney cartoons are better, in the sense that kids can extract the moral from the fiction, and apply it to non-fiction real life. disney franchises are just blurring the lines by using these 'teen idols' and ridiculous storylines that is WAY BEYOND me why anyone with the mental capability of even a chimpanzee would wanna watch it (which is around a 7 yr old kid btw). NONSENSE. ok i don't know why a post about glee has now become a disney franchise blasting session. but yeah. it is the way it is.

2010-01-18T05:08:00.000-08:00

so at 3.28am this morning, i was waken up by excessive noise coming from the opp blk's kitchenette. which was so irritating. i peered out to see whether i knew any of them, and alas, i didn't! so i did the next best thing i could do besides being sleep-deprived. i sent an email to my resident fellow to complain. and so he forwarded my email to the opp's blk rf. which was REAREND enough to attach my email in the email that he forwarded to the blk committee to warn them about the noise. he blocked out my name and room number. but in the email, i stated something like:" glad to be back in f blk after so long." and being the only returning senior in f blk, or rather the entire west wing. an idiot would know it was me. WHAT AN IDIOT. i really dislike him. so REAREND. ugh. never use brain to think. really never.

2010-01-16T07:37:00.000-08:00

"I know there’s no way I can convince you this is not one of their tricks but I don’t care, I am me. My name is Valerie. I don’t think I’ll live much longer, and I wanted to tell someone about my life. This is the only autobiography that I will ever write and, God, I’m writing it on toilet paper. I was born in Nottingham in 1985, I don’t remember much of those early years, but I do remember the rain. My grandmother owned a farm in Tottle Brook and she used to tell me that God was in the rain. I passed my 11 plus and when to girls’ grammar. It was in school that I met my first girlfriend. Her name was Sarah. It was her wrists. They were beautiful. I thought we would love each other forever. I remember our teacher telling us that it was an adolescent phase that people outgrew. Sarah did. I didn’t. In 2002, I fell in love with a girl named Christina. That year I came out to my parents. I couldn’t have done it without Chris holding my hand. My father wouldn’t look at me, he told me to go and never come back. My mother said nothing. But I’d only told them the truth. Was that so selfish? Our integrity sells for so little, but it is all we really have. It is the very last inch of us. But within that inch we are free. I’d always known what I wanted to do with my life and in 2015 I starred in my first film, The Salt Flats. It was the most important role of my life. Not because of my career but because that was how I met Ruth. The first time we kissed, I knew I never wanted to kiss any other lips but hers again. We moved to a small flat in London together. She grew Scarlet Carsons for me in our window box and our place always smelt of roses. Those were the best years of my life. But America’s war grew worse and worse, and eventually came to London. After that there were no roses anymore. Not for anyone. I remember how the meaning of words began to change. How unfamiliar words like ‘collateral” and “rendition” became frightening, while things like “Norsefire” and the “Articles of Allegiance” became powerful. I remember how different became dangerous. I still don’t understand it, why they hate us so much. They took Ruth while she was out buying food. I’ve never cried so hard in my life. It wasn’t long till they came for me. It seems strange that my life should end in such a terrible place. But for 3 years, I had roses and apologized to no one. I shall die here. Every inch of me shall perish. Every inch, but one. An inch. It is small and it is fragile and it is the only thing in the world worth having. We must never lose it or give it away. We must never let them take it from us. I hope that, whoever you are, you escape this place. I hope that the world turns and that things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that even though I do not know you and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you.

Valerie."

2010-01-15T07:02:00.000-08:00

Evey: Who are you?

V. : Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask.

Evey: Well I can see that.

V. : Of course you can, I’m not questioning your powers of observation, I’m merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is.

Evey: Oh, right.

V. : But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace soubriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona. Voila! In view humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the “vox populi” now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin, van guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.

The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.

Verily this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it’s my very good honour to meet you and you may call me V.

Evey: Are you like a crazy person?

V. : I’m quite sure they will say so.

Remember remember the fifth of November

Gunpowder, treason and plot.

I know of no reason why gunpowder, treason

Should ever be forgot…

2010-01-10T06:18:00.000-08:00

Sin Huat Eating House

Geylang Lorong 35

TO ALL MY LOVED ONEs: please do not eat there.

my parents and i spent $201.50 and here's the bill breakdown:

Towels: $1.50

Peanuts (on two teacup plates btw) : $3 each x 2 = $6

Lime Juice: $1.50 each x 2 = $3

Veg: $8

Meat Mixture (roast pork, super dry char siew and lap chiong): $15

Prawns: 9 prawns only!!! $56 which means each prawn costs more than $6 and its not even live. %&$%%#$%

Crab Bee Hoon: 2 crabs prob bout 800g each $112 !?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

MAD. really MAD. i'd rather eat 10000 scoops of icecream.

we're so not going back there.